Taking Offence -Maintain Self-Control
There is one thing that almost all drivers seem to have in common, and that is the tendency to take offence from the actions of our fellow drivers. Men and women included, we appear to be ready to fly into a rage if the other driver does something to offend us. For some people they get upset if they simply find that there are other vehicles on the road competing for space.
Driving in the cities is an exercise in stress and rage where you are surrounded by arseholes who should have taken the bus or stayed at home. The least little thing can set a person off. The reason I’m writing about this is that I was waiting in my car at a red light when a couple of people wanted to cross just as the light changed to green. They simply looked at me and barged right in front of my car.
I flew into an incredible rage, which had to do with the effrontery of people who had the nerve to usurp my green light time. How dare they! I drove about a block or two swearing at them and upsetting myself. Finally I calmed down, and then I started to realise that was way over the top.
There are many examples of the person behind who loses his patience because the person in front is a slow poke. At the first opportunity he overtakes and cuts in sharply and goes like a bat out of hell.
Two people fighting over the same parking bay is a fight I would buy a ticket to see. I once saw a man and a woman in such a fight. Both of their cars were stopped in a wedge position where he had tried to drive in before she had backed in. They both were adamant they were right and the argument flew thick and fast. Luckily I was a pedestrian, but even I did not have the time to watch that struggle to its end. Presumably that was how they left their cars parked. They probably both got towed.
If you wake up one morning and decide to go on the road to be the worst nuisance that you can be, there would be no end to the things that you could do to upset drivers. I don’t recommend you do any of these things because you may not see the day through.
You could try passing someone at high speed, then apply your brakes to take the next exit, thereby making the car you just passed slow down
Drive at 60 kph in the centre of three lanes. You may well simply get run over.
Try driving along a two-way street while talking on the telephone at a slow speed.
Stop along a country lane opposite your mate’s car and have a conversation.
Don’t give way at a side street, thereby causing the driver on the main road to swerve.
Finally, only because I could probably go on and on with this; enter the main road with the courtesy of the driver who has moved over to allow it, then get in a race with him to make him stay in the outside lane.
As I said, these are approved suicide measures that are practically guaranteed to work.
Copyright © 2010 Eugene Carmichael
