Underground parking Hell!

It is just as well that we think of Hell as a place that is underground. It can also be above ground in high rise parking lots because with the size of today's cars it is becoming ever more difficult to park and leave without scraping the sides of your car. To make matters worse every exit it seems has to be on a bend. I have only once scraped my car and I still have the proof.

To begin with, many parking buildings were not purpose built, so we are expected to drive our cars up and down stairs where before people walked. For small cars there is usually not too much of a problem, except some bloody genius has seen fit to place pavement-like concrete high enough so that as you try to get close enough to reach the reader you scrape the side of your car just where it is the most difficult to repair. Bloody idiots!

My Volvo is a sedan. I have come back to it after having parked and found a car that has come in and is now my neighbour that is so large and high I feel as though I am in a toy car. Who needs such massive machines? Just taking the kids to school, these surely are not necessary? I suppose it could be argued that they serve well for defense as I think should I encounter one head-on, send my ashes home.

Then there is always the problem of the people who park so badly that they take up two spaces. Man, the urge to kill when only strangulation will do becomes so strong. How can we be so selfish. When I come into contact with such stupidity I get dizzy.

I have a GJX Jaguar Sovereign that is a long car that I avoid parking in underground or multi-floor car parks. I park only in open air ground level parking areas which provide me enough problems. The next challenge will be those elite cars that drive and park themselves, I'm hopeful that they will solve a lot of the problems that presently exist due to our own stupidity, but as long as we will have a mix of people and robot drivers I can only see a brand new lot of difficulties over the transition period.

Good luck to us all as we will need it!

Copyright (c) 2016
Eugene Carmichael

Car Keys lost!

A dear friend has related to me this week her tale of woe following the disappearance of the key to the car. This reminded me of my own experience that happened many years ago that taught me to never allow it to happen again.

At that time I had rented a car from Boston airport and I drove it north into New Hampshire to go skiing. I rented a place to live and off we went to the ski slopes. After a day out it was time to return to the hotel. I was frozen to the bone. I got the key out of my pocket, but because my hands were so cold I fumbled the key and dropped it. I had not noticed that I had parked directly over a grate into a drain. Even if it were possible to normally remove the covering, with the car standing over it that was out of the question.

None of the options that were possibly open to me were going to be inexpensive, convenient, quick, or warm. In the end getting a second key cost much more than the original rental. I said then that I would never ever again  lose the key to the car. Considering that was more than fifty years ago and it has never happened again, I can say so far, so good.

However, I owned a Chrysler people carrier for which I had about six keys and still managed to lock all six in the car. More trouble, but at least it was during the Summer.

I notice how other people treat their keys because it's something that is very much on my mind. There is often no plan at all to protect the safety and security of such an important item. These days cars come with such high tech security keys that to try and replace them involves so much. Now, if thieves want to steal your car they have to break into your house to get the key, and while they are there they also take your other stuff and drive off in your Porsche.

My routine goes like this. I carry a man bag on which I clip my house keys and my car keys. That way, if I have my bag I also have my keys. Once I reach my destination and I lock the car I immediately attach my car key to my bag in the same location. Once or twice I have been lazy and simply put the key in my pocket. You should see the panic when I reach to where the key should be and it's not there.

I also carry a spare key. This key is completely worthless if it's at home or inside the car. It has to be with me wherever I go. In fact it forms a part of duplicates to all my keys, which makes my bag so heavy. A good object lesson from this is the following incident:  I was far from home at an Ikea store when I was loading the goods purchased in the boot of my car. Someone passing in his car stopped to ask me directions, and during those moments when I was dealing with him his partner stole the keys to my car. Now my car was a sitting duck, just waiting for him to come back when I had moved away from it to report the incident.

What foiled him was that I had a spare set on my belt and I simply drove to the police station to make my report.

The only other thing that can so completely change your plans for the day is the flat tyre. That we cannot avoid if it's going to happen, but at least we carry a spare with us. However, it seems to me that flat tyres are reserved for nights or rainy weather.

So, care and protection of the car key deserves a very high priority, because to lose your key is going to be expensive and a real pain in the arse. Take my word for it, I've done that and it is not something I ever want to repeat.

Copyright (c) 2016
Eugene Carmichael

Driving with the Opposition

I am a person who has made my share of mistakes while driving, and I hope I have learned from them. I am much older and I think I am a lot wiser than when I was a boy racer. Now I place the emphasis on driving safely while anticipating what the other fellow is going to do. I have built up guidelines that keep me safe and out of trouble, and perhaps I have become a little smug.

Once in a while I find myself the passenger in a car that is being driven by the mad opposition. I think this happens for my sins, but there I am at the mercy of  a hooligan on wheels. Someone who flouts not only all my careful guidelines and rules but also the rules of the road. We are driven at great speed when we were not really in any hurry to get to our destination. Why is that necessary?

I wonder what goes through the heads of some people while they are driving? My driver charged through small spaces and cut off others while swerving and changing lanes as though he were a mad man. I found that while looking ahead I was driving for him by pressing down hard on the floor with my toes curled. So, I stopped looking. I simply took in the scenery out the side window as best I could as it flashed on by.

Most people would have been totally stressed, calling out look out for this or that. Not me, I simply told myself that if today is the day when this life ends I will simply go with the flow. I said absolutely nothing. I didn't need to because there was another person in the car with whom the driver was having a conversation.

It's a strange thing about Spain in that drivers are generally in a hurry, as especially those people in the cities usually are, even if they really aren't going anywhere important. I think it's the coffee. We speak quickly and do things in a hurry when we really could take things in less of a panic. This ultimately leads to car crashes on the highway and people die. For this reason I can't wait for the day when all cars will drive themselves. Also, when that happens I won't have to be so selective about who I ride in a car with.

Now, I almost need to give the driver a test before I get in his car as I place my life in his careless hands.

Copyright (c) 2016
Eugene Carmichael