Blog Archive

Sunday, April 26, 2015

The Great American Touring Motor Show in Valencia



It is called Valencia American Fest, and the show is in progress on its second day at the Ricardo Tormo Racing Circuit in Cheste, Valencia, as I write this. I attended yesterday, April 25th and thoroughly enjoyed the day. However, considering the program on offer there should have been thirty or forty times the number of people in attendance. The publicity machine completely failed because people living in the town of Cheste were unaware that anything was going on. I became aware by accident because the story was picked up from a newspaper article. What a shame because it was mega expensive to put on this show with a lot of participants working their hearts out.

There was absolutely something for everyone, in spades. Fabulous cars, bikes and trucks on display! One truck was so big it needs three windscreen wipers. Someone had his VW Transporter wagon on show which is simply an Uber Sound system on wheels. This is a private individual who has spent so much money on his sound on wheels one has to wonder how he found money for food.

The layout of the terrain was as follows: The main racing circuit was the A- ring, of course, and the B-ring was the centre of attention in the paddock area. There was continuous entertainment in the B-ring by stunt riders and drivers who did things that none of us should try at home,or anywhere. When I first got there a driver was running doughnuts in a Seat Leon. My wife owns a Seat Leon and I'm fairly certain she did not know the car was capable of such things.

There were lots of eating and drinking places in between the many static displays.  There were two super sports cars, one an orange coloured Lamborghini superleggora, and the other was a white Spano GTA, both cars looking like they were ready for space travel.

In my opinion the car of the show was number 122, Ford's 2015 Black Mustang. I couldn't resist running  my hand along its lovely lines and curves as though to pet it. A look in the cab revealed lots of silver trim to set off its instrumentation and equipment. The problem for me is that once I got into the bucket seat I may never be able to move my bucket again.

The truck of the show was the Kenworth W900, an out of this world massive monster of a truck. It was fully kitted out with lots of lights and chrome and antennae, and a solar panel on top to add to the comfort of its roomy studio sleeper for two men, or one man and as many women that can stuff themselves inside; because they will want to There was even a boot brush on the step so that you need not step into the cab with dirty soles of your shoes.  When you sit in the cab the seat adjusts for your weight and height.

If you were driving along the highway at night and this truck came up behind you and he turned on only some of his lights you could be forgiven for thinking that a space ship had just landed behind you.

Meanwhile, over in the A-ring there was something continuously going on. When I arrived there the safety car was leading the way for a run around the circuit ahead of at least twelve NASCAR racers. NASCAR came to Valencia in a moderately exciting race, which I enjoyed, but I compared it to Formula 3 and Formula 1 races that I had seen in this same circuit. I should not have done that.

The next race would be one between trucks that we normally see towing trailers with freight. We regard them as slow moving lumbering work horses. After this race I will never see them in the same light again.

Sixteen of these guys lined up for the off, with number 2 quickly taking pole position which he never gave up. Number 35 was last of the pack and as the race  continued over the eleven laps, number 2 eventually caught up with number 35 and lapped him. Eventually the whole field lapped him and he fell back to being last again. Number 2 ran a brilliant race, extending his lead from six seconds to eight seconds, and eventually winning. What excitement as I really didn't expect such vigor from this  group.

Then came a parade of customized towing trucks with special lighting systems and art work. There was one truck, number 16, that was named Violeta. This was the name of my first wife, the mother of my two daughters, who died much too soon in 1982. A truck named Violeta had more significance for me than the owner had intended. I thank him for honouring that good lady.

It was not intended for me, but rather as some kind of honour to people sitting behind me, but the trucks pulled off the track and formed a semi-circle facing us, and they hooted their horns and flashed their lights, and Violeta did doughnuts. What an emotive moment for me, and they had no idea that this little celebration came only a few days later than would have been her birthday.

Later that afternoon a second truck race was scheduled. I had enjoyed the first so much I decided to stay for the second. The line up was the same but this time number 2 started in fifth position. Number 35 was in its usual last position. Number 2 moved up to third position which it held until moving into second place, but then disaster struck, as a water line on number 2 burst causing the trucks behind to have to use their wipers.

Number 23 was driven by a favourite Spanish driver who started in third place. To the sound of furious excitement he moved up to second place, and for a brief time he moved into first place. I thought the whole group of spectators would have a collective heart attack, they were so pumped up. Unfortunately he could not hold the position and gradually dropped back to sixth place, but he gave us something very special to cheer about.

Meanwhile, number 35 was again being lapped by the field to move back to last place, yet again. Alas, number 2 had to make a pit stop, which was quick but he re-entered in ninth place and stayed there. The field was now being led by number 1, with number 7 in second place, and that is how the race ended, with number 23 in sixth place and number 2 in ninth place.

Those races should have been witnessed by sold out spectators. What a pity they weren't!

Copyright (c) 2015  Eugene Carmichael



Sunday, April 19, 2015

Possibly my most important blog yet!


WHY DO PEOPLE DIE ON THE ROAD WHEN THEY SHOULD BE ENJOYING THEMSELVES???

We are all aware of the statistics that reflect how many people die over the Christmas/New Year holidays; the Easter holidays, the Summer holidays, etc. These are times throughout the year we we get a break from work, and we load up the car with family and friends, and then go out to enjoy ourselves, but some of them end up dead,  killed on the road.

If you are like me you may have assumed that an excess of speed was involved; and possibly alcohol or drugs, inattention, distraction by the kids, recklessness, or driving without due care and attention. I have no doubt that in many fatal crashes one or more of these elements were involved. The sad thing is that all of such causes are completely avoidable. This is why such crashes are not accidents. An accident is something that cannot be avoided, and that means they are very rare ocurrences. For instance, I have found myself merrily driving along when suddenly I break out into a fit of violent sneezing. I didn't have a cold or anything that may have indicated I might sneeze. Presumably dust entered my nose causing me to sneeze. When we sneeze we have to close our eyes, and that could cause us to lose control.

That would be an accident.

If a wild animal suddenly darts into the road and we collide with it, that could be classed as an accident, especially if the encounter happened away from an area where wild animals are not usually found and the animal was not the responsibility of anyone. Otherwise, a collision between vehicles generally will be judged the fault of one driver or the other.

THE MOST LIKELY CULPRIT OF FATAL CRASHES:
Driver fatigue!

Typically, when we are on the road during holiday time we take extended journeys. Every driver should stop and rest within two hours of being behind the wheel. Firstly, the designated driver will have abstained from anything that will impair his judgement, including a heavy meal and alcohol and drugs. If the journey is a long one it may be necessary to appoint at least two designated drivers because, especially when driving in heavy traffic, the effect is very tiring. Taking turns driving is much better than one person simply taking a few minutes rest.

You could be the most responsible person on earth, but when fatigue sets in you are simply overwhelmed and the next thing that happens is everyone in the car is dead. Most highways have a rumble strip alongside the righthand of the road. These are for waking the driver up. I have to admit I have been saved by that strip on more than one occasion.

When we are underway the situation in front of us changes so often and so rapidly that we must remain alert. However, the effort to do so can hypnotize us, and that is just as bad as dozing off. So, everyone else in the car may desire a nap, but they too should remain awake to ensure that the driver does not fall asleep.

It's everybody's responsibility to get home safely. Stay awake and stay alert. Your life, and possibly my own, is counting on it!

Copyright (c) 2015  Eugene Carmichael 

Saturday, April 11, 2015

It's all about Judgement!



We have been having heavy rain in Spain lately, which is something for which we are grateful. Our dams have been at historic lows and Summer is just around the corner, so we get to breath a sigh of relief.

When the rains come as hard as we have been experiencing they bring along with them certain problems, especially for drivers, that test our powers of good sense and judgement. Places where we normally simply drive through become flooded, or are likely to flood. At such places we must take extreme caution. To begin with, if we are aware of what is coming it would be prudent to stay off the road. However, should we get caught unawares, then we need to exercise prudent caution.

I live high up a mountain alongside a major pozo de agua. I think it's a strange place to have a major source of water, but there you are.  At the bottom of the mountain there is an outlet for the overflow of this water, which in normal times translates into a babbling brook. It had been raining for five days when on the Monday we suffered torrential downpours. On the Tuesday that turned the slowly running water into a full scale raging river. As a result that closed off the road to all traffic, but one person, who thought that she just had to pass over, launched her car into the river and was immediately swept off the low bridge. Fortunately, the car became stuck. She called home for help, and the call was relayed to the Guardia Civil. As good luck had it they were just next door and responded within a minute of taking the call.

One officer belted up without hesitation while his companion held the lifeline for him to reach the car. The rescuer dragged her out of the car and together they were pulled to dry land. At that point she turned to look at her car. It was gone, swept away into the main Turia river, never to be seen since. Her bad judgement brought her to within seconds of death.

This is one of those stories from which we can all learn. Prevention is best. During periods of such continuous disturbed weather we should be constantly monitoring what is happening, and we should take all reasonable action to protect our family and other precious possessions.

 No one else will do it for us!

Copyright (c) 2015  Eugene Carmichael 

Sunday, April 5, 2015

The Downside of Easter



On my sister blog, ForMensEyesOnly, I wrote about the joy of Springtime in Spain, including the fact that it's time for the Festival of Fallas. It is such a joyful time as Easter is just behind Fallas. Also, in the region of Castellon they celebrate the Festival of Magdelena, an equally wonderful event that I am yet to attend.

But, there is a dark side to all this joy and celebration, and that is so many people are so unecessarily killed on the roads.  Over the period of Easter celebrations it is estimated that some eight million journeys are undertaken. Nowhere is it written that anyone has to die just because so many vehicles are on the road. Many of the people killed have likely driven past the very spot where their lives ended many times before. What had to be so different this time?

I know that we can do better. We see it happening every year since the introduction of the points system. Fewer and fewer people are losing their lives to vehicle crashes. The reasons for that has to be greater care; driving with our judgement fully intact, and treating our cars like the potential killing machines that they are.

One person at a time must assume the responsibility for the safety of the family and passengers. That person is called the Designated Driver. He/She has only one thing to do, and only one thing that they can do: they must be sober and rested; they must keep their eyes on the road, including ignoring the scenic views; ignoring the mobile phone; and ignoring the children. When everybody arrives home safely I suggest to all passengers that they take a moment to thank their designated driver for bringing them through without incident. This includes all the professionals who get us from one place to another safely. That person is your Hero of the Day.

Please don't take that for granted!

Copyright (c) 2015  Eugene Carmichael 

Sunday, March 29, 2015

We drive on Trust.



We have had to come to terms with the fact that a young man would deliberately crash an airplane with 149 people on board because he wanted to end his own life. Why would he do that? Simply because he could!

It has happened several times in the recent past, resulting with over 500 people having lost their lives, and it will happen again in the future. That is just one of the many risks of life with which we must cope. Whether we get to live to celebrate our 100th birthday will require good health, a prudent lifestyle, and a really good measure of very good luck.

Statistically, commercial air travel is still far safer than driving.There are far fewer journeys that end in a crash when flying than when driving. When we set out on a car journey we trust that we will return safely. We should be sober and alert, and we should obey the rules of the road to improve the odds of survival. In the end we rely on our fellow drivers to do the right thing at the right times, and they rely on us to do the same thing. Here in Spain the loss of life on the roads has been improving, in that far fewer people have been victims over the past several years. This is due to a growing sense of responsibility; more people choosing not to drink alcohol our drive under the influence of drugs that impair judgement.

We are proving to ourselves that we can pull together to make a success of driving safely.

The deliberate loss of Germanwings flight AU 9525 should be mourned and the actions of that young man should be condemned, but the best thing that we can do to honour the victims is to live our lives so that no other person loses their life just trying to get from one place to another.

We can do that! I am sure we can!

Copyright 2015  Eugene Carmichael


Sunday, March 22, 2015

Jeremy!



First I have to admit that I am one of the 350 million fans of Jeremy. I read his columns and I have followed Top Gear. I think he has a wicked, irreverant, and very clever sense of humour. But, perhaps because of that, our Jeremy is also his very own worst enemy.

I try and walk in his shoes to get some sense of why he is in such trouble today. I try to imagine myself as an aging media star. He apparently has aboslute freedom to nitpick the work of thousands and thousands of people, or to praise them, and the BBC makes available massive amounts of money for him to express his art.

How much self-discipline and control does it take to keep all that affection and respect from so many people from all around the word in check? How do you keep from thinking that rules don't concern you? One million signatures were collected within a week in your support. Should you think you are invincible? You were clearly warned that rules had to be obeyed because your actions affect so many other people. Should you have cared about that?

No-one can really imagine Top Gear continuing without Jeremy, so I think we are looking at the end of the road in that regard. Jeremy will most probably blame it on everyone else but himself. That's so sad. I, for one will miss him although the BBC has many years worth of re-runs. I imagine everyone else will be gunshy about entering into new contracts with Mr. Clarkson, so what his future holds one can only guess.

When you grow to become as big as Jeremy, and you fall from grace you make a huge splash. We, the 350 million may make a big noise for Jeremy to be brought back. That could happen but he would have to agree to be so tightly bound up that it would not likely last long.

Perhaps it's time to simply acknowledge and recognise how the mighty have fallen, and to move on.

Simply put, it's over!

Copyright (c) 2015  Eugene Carmichael

Sunday, March 15, 2015

The Coming Age of vehicles that drive Themselves!



My wife asked me how did I think I would adjust to being driven in a car that drove itself?

As a person who has driven for more that 55 years, legally, I think I might find it very difficult to accept. However, I may have to get used to it because it will probably happen in my lifetime. In fact, in various forms it is happening now. We step aboard airport trains that run without a human driver and think nothing of it. An elevator is the same thing but its just that it goes up and down. But getting into the family car and programming where we want to go, then sitting back as the car does all the work to get us to our destination will take some getting used to.

However, depending on the quality of engineering, let us assume an age where no human takes the controls. What will that mean?

In one step the roads will become free of idiots, drunk drivers, boy racers, showoffs, egotists, careless drivers, speeding drivers, confused drivers, tired drivers, drivers who think they are actually in their living rooms and not their cars, drivers distracted by their children, drivers who should not be behind the wheel because of sickness or other infirmness; drivers who are under the influence of drugs, both prescribed and recreational, and drivers who no longer have the capacity to control a vehicle because of age. These are only the ones I can think of at the moment, I'm sure you can think of other drivers who should have control taken away from them.

It will also mean the end of traffic fines as the car will respond to traffic signals. There will no longer be any need to construct a vehicle that can travel at 250 kilometres an  hour when the maximum speed limit will be 120. Cars will actually stop where required and only move off when the way is clear. Hopefully there will no longer exist death on the road, so when we leave home to go to the supermarket we can reasonably expect to come home with the groceries. And one more thing that is very important: cars will park themselves in sensible places. This is, of course already available in some model cars.

Presumably the practise of stealing cars will come to an end as only the person authorised will be able to move the car forward.

Will I need a license to drive? If so, why?

All of these considerations are real because Google, and others involved in the search for automated driving are making great strides forward. Automatic driving is a reality as we speak, but not for the general public. How soon will that happen? Probably within the next ten years.

So, I repeat my wife's question for each and every one of you: How do you think you might adjust to this brave new world?

Copyright (c) 2015  Eugene Carmichael

Sunday, March 8, 2015

A Bitter Disappointment!



I was so hoping that on this day, Sunday March 8th, 2015, the one year anniversary of the sudden disappearence of flight MH370, the Malaysia flight that so completely vanished, that the plane with all persons on board would magically re-appear. Why on earth would I think such a thing?

Flight MH 370 changed course from its pre-set flight pattern in a deliberate manner and its contact system was shut down to avoid detection because, presumably it was intended to take the plane to a specific unauthorized destination. My thinking was that this was a well thought out action on the part of Al Queada. I saw it as the follow-up action to their 9-11 show piece, an action that would have to be stunning. To do something in the United States, that was a country on high alert was probably impossible, but in the part of the world of Malaysia, where security was at a lower state of being, something could be possible.

The pilot was Muslim, and he had a simulator in his home. He also possibly had some difficulty in his family, if you believe reports, which would have been likely if he was practising how to land a large airplane in glider mode so as to avoid detection due to the sound of the motors. If the plane had landed deliberately in a pre-determined spot and then hidden, that would have taken a small army that was well chosen and trained. One thing that seems to be certain, judging by the movements of the plane that has been tracked, it appears to have been deliberately flown towards a definite destination.

Let me be clear: I am not saying that the pilot did anything of his own accord to have participated in the disappearence of the plane. We simply don't know what happened. However, I was hoping that in spite of how ludicrous my idea might sound, it would have been fantastic if all passengers and crew re-appeared on this first anniversary, but it wasn't to be.

There is another possibility: we may still be seeing an Al Queada PR action. To make an aircraft completely disappear as if by magic, and to create the world's greatest mystery. That is certainly what we are grappling with, but until they take credit and explain how they did it, and what happened, it has come to an abrupt end.

Copyright (c) 2015  Eugene Carmichael 

Friday, March 6, 2015

On Standby awaiting explosive Breaking News on Sunday March 8th!



I anticipate that Sunday, March 8th will produce amazing news.

Please standby!

Copyright (c) 2015  Eugene Carmichael

Saturday, February 28, 2015

YouTube Driving



Sometimes, when I'm bored I go surfing the web for driving stories. Sometimes friends send me sites. Dave, a good friend of mine, who evidently spends far more time on the internet than I do, sent me a series of videos with the title, "Why Russians install DashCams in their cars." More specifically follow this adress:

I must warn you that this series of videos will have your mouth hanging open with disbelief at the crashes and near misses that are caught on video. I watched them over and over again, each time catching some other detail.

It's carzy, but enjoy, but give yourself lots of time.

Copyright (c) 2015  Eugene Carmichael

Saturday, February 21, 2015

We will all know where the Radars are waiting for us!


In the interest of transparency the authorities have decided to abandon the practise of hiding radars to surprise drivers. Now we will be advised exactly whereever the mobile radars will be operated and when, as well as the fixed stations.

Why would they do this? I think because it's sort of a joke. Large signs exists to tell us that our speed is being monitored, and still people drive through the catchment zones well over the limit. So, in a way this will be a further experiement to see how many more people will be caught in spite of being told to slow down.

Seemingly, in countries around the world the accepted practise is to flash one's lights to warn oncoming traffic that the police are up ahead; and still people don't slown down to the legal limit.

What is wrong with us?

Copyright (c) 2015  Eugene Carmichael 

Saturday, February 14, 2015

Whatever happened to good old healthy Competition?



The cost of petrol for the car and truck in Spain is by no means the most costly in Europe, but it is expensive. In the time that I have been living here the cost has risen steadily from under a euro a litre to as much as 1.40 something. That has been a reflection of the underlying cost of Brent crude per barrel, so we have simply grinned and bore the cost. Perhaps we curtailed our trips by making certain that we got to do several things in one journey.

We didn't have much in the way of choice, but wherever and whenever we heard of a fuel station selling at a discount we all headed there. Then, things changed. Someone opened a fuel station where there were no staff in attendance, and the price per litre reflected the savings. Then, to top that, another chain opened with staff but at rock bottom prices at the pump. I have not looked back since.

The latest news is that those stations that are not matching the low prices are suing the owners for selling cut-rate fuel, and some communities are banning the selling of low cost fuel altogether. What kind of foolishness is that?

If the group of operators selling low cost fuel can do it, and they number several different companies, why not the others who insist on selling at the higher prices? I cannot understand the logic. I save about ten cents a litre, which I estimate will result in about 300 euros a year saved to be spent on car maintenance. Why would I not take that savings?

 I'm shocked by the action to restrict the competitive spirit, and also to be so blatant about goughing us motorists. I think it's time to grow up and act like businessmen and everybody lower your prices to a level that is finally fair for the consumer.

Copyright (c) 2015  Eugene Carmichael

Sunday, February 8, 2015

2015: New driving rules for Spain




The driving class of citizen seems to be a soft target in many ways. We are easy to impose new taxes upon, and it seems that we are constantly having to get accustomed to new rules. However, what I can't say it that all those rules are not necessary. There are those among us who by their stupidity bring ever more stringent rules upon us. When I see the things that some drivers get up to I don't automatically think we need a new rule for that, I think let's shoot the bastard.

Spain has been promising some reform for some time and it appears that these changes will go into effect soon. One of the most surprising changes is that where speed is checked by radar, whatever the limit posted is, should we pass that radar one point over the machine will flag us. Really? Didn't you think that was always the case?

It appears that in the past there has always been a discretionary allowance of about 10 kilometres to allow for the possibility that the system might not have been accurate. Well, they must have fixed that problem, so the limit posted must be obeyed. My problem is that the posting of signs is irrational and a setup to dump the driver in the soup. Some speed changes are so sudden you would have to stand on your brakes to slow down to the new limit. Bastards!

Another change I find interesting, because it allows members of the European Automobile Association to represent drivers who are engaged in disputes with the DGT. I have been wondering what uses a membership in such clubs had, as  the modern motoring policy seems to provide the services formerly provided, such as breakdown. Even providing directions via motoring maps is now available on GPS systems. I admit my knowledge of the full services provided by motoring  membership is limited, but at least we now know that your auto club is standing by to bail you out should you get into trouble with the law.

Speaking of trouble while on the road: It would perhaps be a good idea to repeat for your handy reference the following list of emergency numbers:

The general emergency number anywhere within Europe is      112
For Ambulance Service in Spain call              061
National Police of Spain  091
Local (Municipal) police in Spain  092
La Guardia Civil    062
Fire Service (Bomberos)  080
Medical Emergencies on the Costa Blanca 085

As you can see getting help is not an uncomplicated matter. Different numbers to call, depending on your need. I suggest posting this page in your car.

One other thing you might like to know is what happens when you get a motoring fine: if you suffer a fine of up to 299 euros it appears that you might not also lose points. A fine of between 300 -399 will also lose two points. Between 400-499 loses 4 points. Between 500-600 loses 6 points. However, if these are correct to begin with, remember things change constantly, so don't take these numbers as gospel. Try not to lose any points at all because getting them back would be like winning the lottery jackpot deliberately.

Copyright (c) 2015  Eugene Carmichael                            

Sunday, February 1, 2015

To be lost in a storm




The last week of January, 2015 has been one when Spain has been knocked about by very high winds, some of hurricane strength, and terrible flooding. This is a country unacustomed to dealing with such high winds, so we were not really ready for the damage that can be suffered at the mercy of this aspect of Nature.

Flooding is often the cause of the total loss of your car, and that's so sad. So many homes have a garage under the house, leading to the possibility of waking up one day and finding that the garage is now a swimming pool with your car under water. That's the sort of thing to reduce the most hardened man to tears.

I returned home on Thrusday the 29th January, after a day out and parked in my usual spot, which is to say under a tent surrounded by trees. The weather was temperate and the winds calm. However, as the evening wore on the winds began to rise, which caused me, out of an abundance of caution to move the car to a clearing. This is a routine precaution that I take, and I would do so even if I had to get out of bed.

That night the wind howled as I had never known it, with some gusts so strong that they were like giant hammer blows.  The night passed and I lost no sleep, but in the morning when I was leaving home I opened my eyes to a scene of total destruction. Had I left the car in place two and a half trees would have fallen upon it, as they fell upon the tent. My lovely car, upon which I depend so much, would have been a write-off.  I can't say that I was lucky because I deliberately moved the car away from harm, but it does underscore the point that it pays to be careful.

However, up and down the country so many other car owners were not so fortunate. Cars parked along the street were a common casualty as trees and power poles fell, crushing them like matchsticks. Just as I felt complete relief and joy to know my car is safe for another day, the opposite would have been those owners reaction. So, I have all those people in mind and I feel your pain. If there was nothing a person could have done to move to a safer place, and if you are in the city, you don't have a lot of options, except moving to underground paid parking perhaps, then you are at the mercy of the elements.

Life, is not fair, it's simply Life, and we take what comes our way.

Copyright (c) 2015  Eugene Carmichael 

Sunday, January 25, 2015

The Terror of the Boy Racer


To my eternal shame I admit to having been a boy racer in my youth. I believe at the time my whole structure was misaligned. My brain resided in my penis, and my head, where my brain was supposed to be collected fecal matter until it flowed out of my mouth. Inevitably I crashed and got banged up really good, but the net effect was to shake things into their proper places. Now I find it inconceivable when looking back on the total disaster that I was.

So, it was that I had some understanding for what was going through the mind of the boy racer I encountered this past week. There was nothing going through his mind. Firstly, it was raining, so instead of slowing down and having respect for the condition of the road, boy racer drove like the lunatic he is. He overtookd me on the crest of a hill with no idea of whether traffic was coming towards us. As good luck had it, nothing was coming so we all ducked that bullet.

I went into town and did my errand, but on the way back I came upon a crash, with police and ambulance in attendance. Who was involved was none other than boy racer. He had evidenly been into town and back, and was on his way back again into town. This time, driving fast on a notorious bend he spun out and crashed sideways into a truck that was an unmovable object, that left boy racer and his BMW in a very sorry state. He was being loaded into the ambulance when I drove by. Wonderful! His car looked like a total write off. I can only hope that he will be out of commission for a very long time so at least he remains away from behind the wheel.

I suppose that as young people we all go through various forms of self-destruction. If it is a part of our DNA to do such things there will not be a lot that we can do,except to survive, if we're lucky. It's probably some form of a culling of the species, but for those of us who survive our own experience we can only shake our heads and make tut tut noises. The other thing that we have to do is hope that when one of these kamikaze nut cases are coming our way that it simply ends up as an argument between that person and a tree, in which case the tree will win.

Life's funny that way!

Copyright (c) 2015  Eugene Carmichael



Copyright (c) 2015  Eugene Carmichael

Sunday, January 18, 2015

Parking can be worse than Driving!



Unfortunately, due to a technical problem I can't share with you a picture that speaks more than a thousand words.

I chose to write about some drivers who are even worse at parking than they are at driving. This was because during the week I parked in an authorised parking area that does not have parking bays outlined. Somehow, four other drivers found it made sense to them to hem in myself and two other cars. I was looking for some sort of logic to try and understand how and why they would do that while I waited for one of the damned fools to come back.

I thought about a common practise that went on for years in Valencia City. In the city. you might have parralled parked your car along the curb, only to come back to find that another row of cars have parralled parked alongside your line. The idea was to leave their cars in neutral with the handbrake in the off position so that you could push all the cars that was necessary in order to get out. No one seemed to get angry. I guess they felt that next time it would the other person's turn to push.

I went looking for examples of really bad parking, especially that which showed a complete lack of care or concern on the part of the offending drivers. The picture I wanted to show you was of three cars that were hemmed into the disabled parking bays by two drivers who had deliberately parked so that it was clear they were causing great inconvenience. One of those cars was an Audi that was evidently driven by a person who had fecal matter where the brain would normally be.

Shame! Shame! Shame!

One thing I do not understand is, that when taking the picture of such a disgraceful thing, the number plate is digitallyy obscured. May I suggest that newspapers regularly run such pictures, leaving the plates unobscured and naming and shaming the car owners. It seems to me that in order to get people to be responsible for their actions the school of public opinion could be very effective. Obviously, if that person is allowed to simply drive away without any condemnation, they will repeat their thuggish actions.

I will finish by relating my favourite story: I was having a coffe at a cafeteria at a table alongside the roadway. A little farther along a man started honking his horn because someone had parked hemming him in. He honked his horn for about five minutes. A lady at a table two along from me got up, casually said goodbye to her companion, and to my astonishment she walked along to drive away in her car; the one that was blocking the man in. He noticed as well and got out of his car and they got into it. Yelling and screaming very foul words back and forth. Finally, he got back in his car, but she had something more to say to him, so she threw open her door just as another car came along and ripped the door off.

I hope she learned a lesson that day, but most probably that was asking too much.

Copyrigt (c) 2015  Eugene Carmichael

Sunday, January 11, 2015

A very bad start to the New Year

The period between January first and the seventh, covering the aftermath of New Year celebrations and the sixth, being the Reyes festival when the Three Kings visit the homes to give the children their gifts, was a time when things went horribly bad for many families. Fifty people lost their lives on the roads at a time when no-one should have ended their lives.

The formula for surviving such disasters is simple. Do not get behind the wheel if you have been drinking alcohol or taking drugs. You really do need your full sense of concentration because things change so suddenly. I do not even take my eyes off the road to operate my CD player, and I don't respond when my phone rings. No one ever needs to contact me instantly, although they may think so.

I feel saddened for the families that were afftected, especially the children. The worst death was that of a man who was playing the role of one of the Three Kings. His throne was caught by an overhead cable and he was toppled backwards and landed on his head. For the children, and their parents, watching this happen it was a calamity of the greatest proportions. That will be stamped on the minds of the children for the rest of their lives.

I hope we accept the warnings and that we conduct ourselves with care, caution, sobriety, common sense, and concern for ourselves and our fellow drivers. Nowhere is it written that we have to die while going about our normal daily business just because we are behind the wheel of our car.

Copyright (c) 2015  Eugene Carmichael

Sunday, January 4, 2015

Unlucky Nineteen: An Unwelcome upturn in the number of those fallen on the road!

This image suggests a better year for driving experience then the past year.

We have been given the figure of 1, 131 lives lost due to road crashes during 2014. For the very first time since the introduction of the points system, when there has been a steady decline in losses, this year saw a jump in the number from 1, 112 during 2013 to 1, 131 during 2014. Any which way we look at this situation it's a sad story. Many of the people who lost their lives prematurely were young people. Far too many of the lives were lost due to someone's total stupidity.  But somehow, seeing that the figure actually rose rather than another decline is particularly depressing.

There will be those who say, but yes, but remember there was a time when annual losses used to be 5,191. That was a time when the whole country found that number just totally unacceptable and undigestable.

There are reasons we return in the evening after a day of travel. The reasons are that everyone we encountered during the day were alert and focused, as were we. Everyone took care to be courteous and drove with due care and attention. Probably, we all decided that we would not drink then get in our car and drive. At the end of the day we all returned to our loved ones.

I am fond of pointing out that in my homeland of Bermuda, as pat of the New Year Eve celebrations, the government makes taxis available for revellers to leave their own cars and to ride home, without cost, just so that we don't have people trying to drive home drunk. There are also a lot of policemen around at parking lots, etc to "suggest" very strongly in some cases that you need to take a taxi sir, and here's one now. Get In!

Result: Not one single accident after midnight December 31/ January 1.

What a lovely way to begin the New Year.

Drive safely and carefully. 2015 could be a really great year for you, but only if you're alive to see it through.

Copyright (c) 2015  Eugene Carmichael  

Sunday, December 28, 2014

Driving with Rewards

Its encouraging to be recognised for good driving habits.


I'm sure that other people share the same experiences as I do. When you find yourself thinking in a certain direction, and then you discover that someone else was on the same wavelength, but they actually did something about it.

For some time I have been thinking that perhaps there is nothing so fraught with rules as driving, and people just lying in wait for me to commit some kind of infracton. The relation between the police and the public seems to be completely adversarial. However, they police us with our consent, so I'm fairly certain we did not contemplate having them splitting our skulls, shooting us to death, or pulling us out of our cars to dump us in jail.

I do agree that we need to conduct ourselves with commonsense and courtesy toward our fellow drivers, so rules are important to guide us. But, it is all about rules and infringements.

Now comes along a television program through National Geographic called, "Under Control." I have to say that I am enjoying this program as they have tried some ideas that actually reward drivers respecting the speed limit, and other safe practices. In the test town the police are  noticing when people are naturally considerate and safe drivers, and they are issuing these people with Thank You certificates.

Imagine you are moving along at your customary pace and taking care of cyclists and pedestrians, when you hear a short burst from the police cruiser behind you. The first thing out of our mouths will likely be: "Now what the hell does he want?" The officer comes up to your window and says, "Good day, Ma'am, or Sir. I just wanted to thank you for driving with care and courtesy, and for being such a fine example to others. I present you with this certificate on behalf of the Commissioner of Police and all my fellow officers. Have a good day and keep it up!"

I think if that happened to me it would take me a litle while for it to sink in, and then you would see the biggest smile on my face. I would definately be encouraged to continue in the manner that got me recognised.

I think it might also go some ways to recognize the police as human beings and our fellow residents. Some times we, and they forget that their remit is to protect and serve us, their fellow law abiding citizens.

Copyright (c) 2014    Eugene Carmichael

Sunday, December 21, 2014

Cancel Christmas?


Christmas is too wonderful to cancel because someone in the family lost their life in a road crash that could have been avoided. Most can be avoided. I always ask the question when I come upon a crash scene: Hundreds of thousands of cars have passed this spot without crashing into one another. Why not you two?

While watching the news there was a story of a car that had broken down on the highway in the left lane. The police were called, and during the time it took for the police to arrive that car sat there in what a lot of people call the fast lane without anyone crashing into it. That alone is amazing.

Finally, the police arrived and stopped in the left lane, with all their emergency lights working, to shield the stalled car. From the Dgt camera we see a car approach from the right hand lane and cross over the center lane to score a direct hit on the police cruiser. What the hell was that about?

At this time of year, whether a person is seeing the season from a religious point of view or not, the most important objective is to survive the fiestivities on the road. There is nothing more effective than someone in the hospital or the morgue to take the joy out of the season.

Of course, as we are in Spain we should be aware that there are many who will not have anything to celebrate except perhaps their faith. Faith is important, if you believe, but so many people have gone through many Christmas' without anything in the way of creature comforts. It would be good to be aware of our neighbours and to spread some goodwill if we can. Also, hopefully El Gordo will help people who really need it. (Like me.)

The best wishes of my family and myself are extended to all of you, dear readers, that you spend the holidays surrounded by love, and by giving love. A world without love is not worth living in.

May 2015 be a year of growth and excellent health for us all. Above all else, let's remember the thought for the day is: The most important thing is to return the way you left.

Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year!

Copyright (c) 2014  Eugene Carmichael  


Sunday, December 14, 2014

All I want for Christmas is.....

this gorgeous baby to droll over and to love more than life itself!

This is the Masereti Quattroporta VI Generation.
It is a four-door sports luxury saloon that I dream of as though it were my woman. (Sorry Lorna)

Why on earth do I have such a yearning to own a Masereti? Probably because it is a rare breed. I already own a Jaguar, and that is a prestigeous name in the world of cars and I do adore my Big Cat. However, it is a classic that I drive only on very rare occasions, provided the sun is shining. My faithful Volvo does all of the heavy lifting day-to-day, but she is getting long in the tooth. I really do need to replace her with something new. I was first thinking that I should choose a Jeep. That brand name has the distinction of having served the armed forces of the United States in war times and acquitted itself well. I would be proud to be a Jeep owner, but I just can't get the idea out of my head that I really do want a Masereti. The sign of Neptune's Trident stands proud and alone among the upper quality range of cars, in my opinion.

I am looking at a secondhand 2007 model that is for sale. The model shown is the latest, but these are some of the features of the 2007 car. It has heated seats, electric front and rear adjustable seats, electric rear blind, in case the people in the back seats require privacy. Why would they? Make something up. Parking sensors, 19" alloy spoke wheels, HiFi radio and Cd player, of course.  Climate control is dual controlled, and the driver's seat has memory positions. The steering column is electronicially adjustable and is multi-functional, and the car has traction control.

Anti-theft features high volume siren and immobiliser. As an option I would also like to have ejector seats or hand locks with an automatic puncher in the gut that can be operated from a long distance.

In the technical department it has a 4244 cc engine that produces 395 bhp. Supposedly it will get you from 0-60 mph in 5.6 seconds, and will do a top speed of 167 mph.  I am not worried about that because at my age I need to slow the world down.

This one is advertised for sale at 18,000 Pounds, or I could buy a brand new one for about 100,000 pounds.

Santa, that last bit of information was especially for you.

Copyright (c) 2014  Eugene Carmichael

Monday, December 8, 2014

More Spanish Rules of the Road to review.

Our bad driving habits become the norm.

Things are forever in a state of change when it comes to driving on the road. Things that were once tolerated have become objects of zero tolerance, so it makes sense to keep abreast of what's going on. When I first came to Spain fifteen years ago, many drivers went through the day in a constant state of inebriation. Now, that is not tolerated.

What about the Stop sign? A long time ago I was driving behind a car that went through the stop sign at about 30 kmh. The police were parked across the street and made no indication to go after him.  I concluded that the maximum speed per hour in my country counts as being stopped here. No longer! Periodically, the police target specific offenses and when it comes to bringing your car to a stop those wheels need to be absolutely still, neither rolling forward or backward. Stop means an absolute standstill. This is a problem far greater than anything else for a lot of us who have become complacent, especially if it is obvious that the road is clear. However, the law is the law, and compliance is what this is all about.

One other thing: For goodness sake, stop behind the line instead of poking your nose out until you can see clearly. By that time you may indeed see that you are about to get broadsided by a truck!

Speeding

This is even more complex than stopping and standing still. Personally, I am very good at driving at 80 or 100 or 120. The problem arises when we are supposed to slow down. When we see a sign mandating a lower speed, by the time we pass that sign our speed must not exceed the number. However, given the really dopey sign posting, in order to comply we sometimes would have to just about stand on our brakes to go from 70 to 50. There is one stretch of road when we are leaving a town with a 50 maximum. We are advised that we can take her up to 70, starting at the sign, but just as you get to 70 there's another sign that says 50. Oh shit! Clearly there was no need for the 70 sign. There are so many assinine situations like this, and sometimes the police lie in wait right there. Its a really easy catch, sort of like fishing in a barrel.

I can't say that I don't want the police to enforce staying within the speed limit. I drove with a friend the other day, at least I think he's a friend. We were in no hurry at all, but he drove at speeds up to 180 kmh. I was fairly certain that would have been my last day among the living. Even the ambulance doesn't travel that fast. Such stupidity!

Almost all car crashes involve inappropriate speed. That may not necessarily mean a lot of speed, but if conditions call for us to move at no more than 20 and we're doing forty, that's a problem going somewhere to happen.

Giving someone who has broken down a tow.

This was allowed at one time, although it was never a safe thing to do Now, because of modern cars that require the engine to be running to operate brakes and steering, it is no longer possible or legal.

Which brings to mind what to do if you are driving an automatic shift car and the gas pedal gets stuck. There is only one thing to remember to do and that is shift into neutral. The car will scream like a banshee but you will still be able to pull over to the breakdown lane and stop, before turning off the ignition. If you do anything else you will most likely end up dead. Remember, shift into neutral, let the engine make all the noise it wants while you drift to the side of the road, then turn off the ignition.

Then you contact your roadside breakdown service to come and put you on the back of the truck and haul you off to a garage. Nothing else will work.

We'll review some more of the rules that we have forgotton about or that practise has changed in future columns.

Copyright (c) 2014  Eugene Carmichael

Sunday, November 30, 2014

Time to review Spanish driving rules

Texting while Driving- Utter madness! Most likely the life that will be lost will be that of someone else.


Someone has kindly gone to the trouble to alert those of us in the Jaguar Enthusiast Club that we need to revisit Spain's driving rules. As time goes by we tend to forget the specifics and find ourselves creating bad habits. The model in the above picture is reflecting one of the most serious bad things a driver can do. If just speaking on the phone while driving is dangerous because it distracts us from concentrating on the road ahead, texting is just plain murderous and suicidal. Please don't do this.

I was glad to have these reminders because over time I have developed a really bad habit of cruising along the middle lane. My thinking was that this makes it easier for merging traffic, which of course it does, but the rule is that we cruise in the right hand lane by default unless we have to overtake. Here in Valencia, another bad habit has grown, that of overtaking along the right side. This is caused by driver impatience and by those of us, and we are many, who hog the middle lane.

Well, it seems that this habit is deemed to be dangerous driving and can result in time spent in jail, even if it does not cause someone else to crash.

Another interesting rule that has become muddled over time is that of driving the car of someone else. For so long we have been saying that provided that you hold a valid European driving license you can drive anyone's car. Well yes, but only with their permission. If the owner is in the car with you, no problem. If not, they must have your written permission in Spanish.

What happens when you are asked for your car? The person is always in a hurry and anxious to get going. All they want is the keys. They really don't want to hear, just a minute while  I sit down and write up a letter giving you permission. Well, tough, but that is just what they should have to do, otherwise it will be another act of kindness that will be punished.

Also, there is the matter of cyclists to take into account. This is a growing sport and exercise activity which means that we are encountering more and more groups of cyclists. They have every right to use the road, and for those of us in cars we have to learn to respect them and to give them space. To overtake them we should cross over to the other lane as though they were a car. And, of course, they can be strecthed out over a distance and that makes overtaking very tricky. If we are unable to overtake the lot, we should not even begin to do so.

I will highlight other rules as a reminder in the near future. For now, drive safely and turn your common sense on.

Copyright (c) 2014  Eugene Carmichael

Sunday, November 23, 2014

The Jobsworth in Action!

The Highway Toll Booth

During this Summer there ocurred a number of fires in Spain. One such fire required the assistance of all hands, so dangerous and enormous was it. It devoured a whole mountain and threatened hundreds of homes in the area with a city just beyond. In other words, as emergencies go, this was about as serious as it can get.

One fire engine from a community that was at a distance went speeding on its way to give assistance. The fastest route was along the toll road. As it neared the entrance to the toll booth the operator opened the barrier and let the engine through without having to stop or get a ticket. That made all the sense in the world. However, when they wanted to exit the toll road the story was very different.

This would be a really funny story were it not so sadly serious. Here you are, a fire engine with siren warning all to pull over to the side and clear a path for us because we are trying to stop a fire from doing serious damage. Traffic makes a path for you, but you arrive at the barrier and the operator does not lift it. The siren is still screeching but the engine has come to a stop.  "OPEN THE BARRIER!" demanded the driver. Sir, you have to pay, says the simpleton jobsworth.

To the astonishment of absolutely every person who witnessed the incident, and probably all who have read or even heard about it, an argument developed between the driver, together with the firemen, urging this appparently absolutely moronic operator to open the gate and let the engine proceed.

With precious moments slipping away the driver finally paid with his own credit card and the engine went on its way.

Of course, that was not the end of it. It has not been reported as to what the outcome of complaints made to the roads management was, but I would bet money that the operator did not lose his job. I think if management recognised that the man was incapable of making the decision to treat emergency vehicles with discretion he would not have been replaced. His union would not hear of it. If such vehicles are to be given free passage management would have to put that in writing and specific instructions given to all employees.

As a result of the delay that obstructed the arrival of the engine team we can reasonably assume that more damage was caused that otherwise might have been limited. Street Justice can only hope that the operator will learn to his own chagrin what can happen when unnecessary obstruction is put in the way of those who are trying to help.

"What goes around , comes around."

Copyright (c) 2014   Eugene Carmichael

Saturday, November 15, 2014

What are we thinking when we overtake?

Sometimes I wonder!

What has got me thinking is this past week I have confronted two trucks on two seperate occaisions overtaking two cyclists on two bends. On both times I have been driven into the side of the road. Clearly, both of these drivers have excrement where they are supposed to have brains. Still, the question is a good one because drivers put themselves out into the lane of oncoming traffic, and that has killed so many innocent people.

I recall some incidents from the news that were so incredible I have never forgotten them. In the region of Torrevieja there arose a traffic jam. A man who was driving a right hand drive car suddenly decided to pull out into oncoming traffic, even though he could not see if anything was coming. An oncoming bus carrying school children slammed into his car, instantly killing his wife in the passenger seat, and their friend who was sitting behind her.

The bus went out of control and turned left into the line of traffic pushing a sports car carrying a male driver, who was killed, and his pregant girlfriend, who survived with her baby intact. Bus and car went through the guardrail and down an embankment, and the bus landed on top of the car. Inside the bus children were thrown about like toys. One of the girls went straight through the windscreen and had to be taken to hospital by air ambulance.

The driver of the car survived because he was on the right side of the car; however, no-one could find out what he was thinking because he lost his mind and is locked up as a criminally insane person.

A whole category of insane nutters are those who have overtaken me only to pull off the road right in front of me, causing me to at least take my foot off the gas, and sometimes I have even had to tap the brakes. To all of you brainless wonders I really do hope that you will do something, without injuring someone else, that causes you such pain, expense, and inconvenience that you come to see the folly of your ways. You are Public Enemy Number One! I hate you!

For ordinary people simply driving along the motorway, we choose a speed and we will inevitably catchup with other people who are driving slower. To overtake such slower moving traffic is no big deal, provided we overtake on the left. In the Valencia region it has become a habit of so many drivers to overtake along the right side outside of city limits where this is strictly prohibited, and is a very dangerous practise. Now what could possibly be going through those people's minds? There cannot be any justification for doing something like that. The person most at risk is the one passing along the right side, and as such is suicidal. Of course, it's simple laziness.

Finally, the national roads in Spain have all been called dangerous, when the roads themselves just sit there waiting to be used responsibly. They are all generally two lanes, one for each direction, or at least they carry two-way traffic. They are busy thoroughfares which mean that to place your vehicle in a lane for opposing traffic must only be done with extreme care. There is no room for error.

Death through head-on collision is the number one killer of the guilty and innocent alike. The stories reflecting such events make very grim reading indeed!

What the hell were they thinking?


Copyright (c) 2014  Eugene Carmichael

Sunday, November 9, 2014

Beware Motorists, The highwayman is busy in your area!

There are people who want to stop you and relieve you of your valuables!

Everyday, seemingly ordinary people  arise, have breakfast and go off to work as part of the multitudes who do the same thing. However, this group work at stealing your valuables if you let your guard down for a moment.

I wish to warn you that an old con is back in play with a new twist, and is causing a lot of people serious problems.

The Setup

The target driver will be someone driving alone.

Usually the thieves need a busy parking lot,such as a commercial centre to make the setup. They will place a large nail against one of your tyres at an angle so that when you move forward you will drive the nail into your tyre causing a flat to develop. As a routine, you can foil this plot by simply rolling backwards before moving forward.

If you do not do this you will leave the parking lot to find that by the time you reach the first roundabout you have a tyre that is fully flat. Typically, the thieves will target the rear tyre on the driver's side so that your attention will be focused on that side.

The execution

When you pull over there will be a man standing on the side of the road. He will take notice and come over to offer assistance. What he is looking for is an opportunity to grab your personal bag and make a run for it. You can foil this if you lock the car when you exit, preferably taking your bag with you. You can always call for roadside assistance after placing your warning triangles and just sit in the car and wait.

What the thief stands to gain, and you have to lose

People who have fallen victim to this ploy have said that they lost money and other valuables, credit and debit cards, keys to their house and the house address, mobile phone that even stopped them calling the police, and their bank, etc; as well as various other personal stuff.

So, remember, whereever you are, roll back before moving forward, and lock your car when you get out, especially if there is someone around. As a more thorough security measure we should actually look at our tyres, both in front and behind to ensure that nothing has been placed there. It will only take a little time before the thieves are more cunning in thier setup.

Be vigilant!


Copyright (c) 2014   Eugene Carmichael

Sunday, November 2, 2014

Far fewer people take driving lessons.

Heading for the open road


Sometimes here in Spain we find ourselves driving in the campo through orange or lemons fields, where there will be lots of fallen fruit on the path. That inspired someone to write a popular book called, "Driving over lemons." Now, some wiseass has come up with a title, "Driving over Spaniards." He has the title but the book hasn't been written yet. I hope it never will.

The Spanish authorities have been struggling with the same problem as other countries, that being rising congestion on the roads. Spain has partially confronted the problem by building a wonderful network of roads crisscrossing the countryside. Sometimes a driver can find he has the road all to himself. However, all of those wonderful roads eventually lead to towns and cities, where it all goes horribly wrong.

In the past it has seemed that the problem was addressed by making it very difficult to pass the exams. Firstly, it was necessary to study the rules of the road, followed by exams to determine how much the student had understood and retained. However, I found when sitting my test that it was more about my understanding of how the test was administered than what I had learnt from the book.

This had the effect of holding back the numbers of newly certificated drivers to go out and buy yet a another car to add to the clutter.  One examination center was testing about 5000 students per week, or 20,000 per month times twelve. If everyone who simply knew the information passed , that would add about a quarter of a million new drivers a year on the road. That alone might not be that bad, although it would still increase the clutter if they were only driving cars that were already registered. But, more than likely they would go out and buy their own cars and now we can quickly see the problem.

The economic crisis is generally thought of as a bad thing, but perhaps not down at Trafico. It is having a major effect on driving schools as new student enrolments have fallen dramatically leading to business closures. The impact is both immediate and potentially for the future. There was a time when it was difficult to find anyone of driving age who did not hold a permit. Having a vehicle to travel from one place to another is no longer a luxury. It is an absolute neccesity. For instance, from my village there are two bus journeys a day. One in the morning to take people to the next largest town for connecting bus and train service; and one in the late afternoon back into the village.

Who can conduct business with such restricted public service? If young people are unable to obtain their permits when learning ability is at its best, what are these same people to do as they grow into mature adulthood. True, employment opportunities are scarce but when you add to the mix that you are unable to drive, that is like another nail in the coffin.

This is just another of the sad, but unintended consequences flowing from out of control economic management.

Copyright (c) 2014  Eugene Carmichael   

Sunday, October 26, 2014

Vanity Plates

Where's the Humour?

The problem with vanity plates is that most motorists want to give a funny mesage but the DMLV in every country of the world has no sense of humour.

Here in Spain we don't do Vanity plates, so it's not a problem, except by error. We have four numbers followed by up to three letters. By converting to English we can make all sorts of meanings from letters that begin with F. There are actually cars driving around with the letters FU, and nobody even blinks, except the British and Americans. In fact. English swear words in Spain have no meaning or offence at all. Spanish swear words don't offend even British Nuns, although we hear them on television news and talk shows.

I have seen the letters HA, as in Ha! My own letters are ES, as in the letters used to express España.

I think in countries that allow it, probably the most overused or abused theme is sex. "IM2SEXY" or "ILVSEX" or "SEX4ME" are high on the list of wishful thinking.

What made me think of this was I found myself behind a car with the plate that read, "HMM", as in Hmm!

I would pay for that one.

Copyright (c) 2014  Eugene Carmichael

Sunday, October 19, 2014

There is nothing so sad as a sunken car

To find this when you come back to the parking lot must be the nightmare of all nightmares for drivers.

My country is just waking up to the aftermath of extensive damage caused by Hurrican Gonzalo, a category four hurricane. With so much to take in at once, the combination of damage to the house, the garden, the estate road, and the car must be overwhelming. Of course, there are those people who own both a car and a boat, especially a luxury boat. The human psyche is not designed to cope with that type of tragedy.

Some of us just get so carried away with our cars. For instance, I belong to a motoring society that goes well over the topic by being super car proud. We drive our classics, but only on sunny days. We take them home and we wash them, then we carefully park them in the garage, and then we cover them.

If our cars were actual women, having received such loving attention from us, of course they would want to have sex with us. The motorcycle lot are no better. I was once a member of a Goldwing club and the pampering our bikes got was just silly.

So, we lavish such attention on our cars and bikes only to either be involved in a crash, or worse, to have a deluge occur resulting in submersion.

My pride and joy is a clasic Jaguar XJ6 Sovereign that is in showroom condition. I was told when I bought it that no one had ever sat in that car with dirty shoes, not even the mechanic. What must it be like to come back to the car and find it full of mud. My cream coloured seats and mats destroyed forever. I truly do believe that I would simply turn and walk away. Like a disappointed lover on finding the love of my life had been with another man. She's damaged and dirty. I shall retire to my cave and have a good cry.

I sincerely hope that not too many people lost their cars, and their sanity  in this manner during the Bermuda hurricane.


Copyright (c) 2014  Eugene Carmichael

Sunday, October 5, 2014

The loss of Jan de Jonge

The Last Hurrah!

Jan de Jonge considered me to be his friend, and I considered that to be a great honour. A couple of years ago I wrote about Jan and his hobby of racing MGB cars, of which he had seven  at the same time. Jan was a jeweller by professon, but he absolutely had a passion for MGB's. He was a member of the MGB racing community, and in that he was in good company. One of those against whom he raced was none other than Mr. Bean, a.k.a. as Rowan Atkinson.

Jan took early retirement a few years ago to enjoy life away from the stress of his profession, which appears to us laymen as being a gentle art, but which  I am assured can be a real headache. His days were kept busy, either preparing to race, or racing at home or abroad, including in England. When he was not doing that, he was working with his friend, Robert in rebuilding MGB's that were the worse for wear. The car pictured above was the last one that he rebuilt and finished just ahead of his demise. It is truly a gem!

Jan knew sometime ago that he was seriously ill. He underwent treatment that weakened his physical self, but not his spirit. Oh, he had his good days and his bad ones, but on balance he never lost his sense of humour. He lived in Holland, and to amuse himself he bought two cars recently, because he could not decide between them. He bought the James Bond brand, an Aston Martin, and he also bought a new model Jaguar. How on earth do you choose each time you leave the house between those two, I just don't know.

In early August my wife told me that we were going to be going on a  journey. I never ask where, or how, or why. However, for some time I had been thinking that I really must make the trip to Holland. Without consulting me, or not having any connection to Jan's illness, my wife had chosen a trip to Amsterdam. So, it was a complete surprise to me that I ended up at Jan's house, surrounded by all my Dutch friends, and I also got some one-on-one time with Jan.

Even more surprising was that he and his wife had decided to visit their holiday home that is next door to ours here in Valencia. They arived on the Thursday and we followed on the Friday. More quiet time was enjoyed between us over several days. We talked about death as not being a permanent state; and that our personal energy, accumulated knowledge, our talents, and even our personality are all recyclable, and are passed on to the new generation. In that regard we were here before, we are here now, and when we step through death's door we step into the next adventure. We are living eteranl life in the best way there is. Our lives are a serial story.

Three weeks later, after leaving Valencia, Jan passed away in his sleep, unafraid, peacefully, and I think, comfortable in the journey he was about to take.

He was one of those persons who made a lasting impression upon everyone he met. He was just such a pleasent man who never needed to raise his voice, and in his going he has left a surprising void where we did not expect.

"Jan, it was my great pleasure in getting to know you. I truly enjoyed the time we spent in each other's company. I'm very sorry you had to take your leave so early, but I feel certain we will recognize each other in the next life that you have already started. There is no point in me wishing that you Rest In Peace, because I know you will keep busy doing something that you love in your new body.

I do join with your family and all your friends in missing you!"

Copyright (c) 2014  Eugene Carmichael

Sunday, September 28, 2014

Cruisin

Looking Good!

We all buy the car that best suits our own personality. Ideally we should look cool while driving it. As young men we like to go cruising in our chick magnet because it feeds our massive egos. Well, that's life. The girls do the same thing and the world goes around.

From my youth comes a really sad tale that involves a man who was gay. This is not about gay bashing, it is simply a story about one very sad and lonely man. This particular man would drive up and down the country trying to give a ride to young boys standing at bus stops. At times you would be grateful, especially if it looked like rain.

Once you were in his car he was the essence of a gentleman. First he would start with small talk, but before long he was into what he needed and hoped you would help him with. I have no idea what his statistic was between those who said drive on, versus those who demanded that he stop this car. He could be seen cruising for many years. I used to catch the bus regularly. I made the mistake of getting in his car once. I kept him talking until he got to where I needed to get out.  I told him that I thought he was a very nice, but creepy man, and that I felt sorry for him. Clearly he was unhappy, and that his lifestyle was a cause of problems.

I also asked him to remember me because I really didn't want him to offer me a ride again. This worked for a while, but eventually he forgot who I was and stopped to offer to take me where I had to go.

Wonder whatever happened to Mr Creep Crawly?

Copyright (c) 2014  Eugene Carmichael

Sunday, September 21, 2014

Gross Abuse of Power?

Justice for All!

Firstly, readers are reminded when passing through an area of roadworks, whether lines have been painted orange or not, that we are obliged to have our lights on regular beam, just as we would do if the road had been modified from one way to temporary two way traffic.

The Costa Blanca News has reported an incident that seems to me to be gross abuse of power. It started with the police issuing a fine to a motorist who failed to turn on his lights while passing through an area of road works that was indicated by orange colored lines; and presumably work being carried out. The man was fined eighty euros with a 50% discount which he received by promptly paying the fine.

Time passed, when suddenly his bank account was frozen due to an embargo placed upon it due to a notional debt of 200 euros arising from the same traffic incident. This arose because the settlement of the fine had not been deemed satisfactory because trafico had decided that he had not been fined enough in the first place, so they arbitraliy increased the fine without informing him. Added to that they have assessed late payment interest that they have simply deducted from his account.

This of course raises the question who sets the level of fines and how are they set? I imagine that the police are as baffled as everybody else. Someone seems to think this is either very funny, or that they are a dictator. This case should be heard in open court and the person behind the pilfering of this man's account be required to explain themselves.

We live in a civilized society where the majority of us try to conduct our business and our lives within the law. That applies to everybody, and especially to those in authority whom we hold to a higher order. It is clear to reasonable people that something out of order has occurred and the citizen needs to be made whole.

Copyright (c) 2014  Eugene Carmichael  

Sunday, September 14, 2014

It had to Happen!

The arm of a Dummy


We have all seen those drivers who cruise along with their left or right arm (depending what side the steering wheel is on) carelessly hanging out of the car window, sometimes with a cigarette in hand, or at other times gesturing as they have a conversation with their passenger.  I was following just such a driver recently when we were faced by an oncoming massive truck. It didn't occur to the car driver to pull his arm in.

I have been watching a National geographic program recently called 1000 ways in which to die. Other than being gruesome it really is a good program from the standpoint of pointing out the importance of thinking before we act. To take just a second to ask ourselves whether what we are about to do makes sense could make all the difference.

A classic personal example is something I do a lot. As I get to travel along certain roads and I get to know those roads well, I assess the danger potential from the standpoint of what could possibly happen. There is a long, almost straight dual carriage-way road leading up to my town. There is usually a temptation to put the pedal down as there are generally no police around. However, except the first time that I did it I have resisted a second experience because along that road there are several entrances from the fields.

Sure enough, I came upon a bad crash where one car was overtaking another only to crash into a thrid car that was entering the main road, but he had stuck his nose out too far. It was bound to happen, sooner or later.

Along our three kilometre estate road there are three stop signs that are habitually ignored. I have seen several near crashes, one involving a police car into which I would have crashed had I not taken the precaution that the other driver might not have stopped. Last month there occurred a broadside crash that brought an ambulance and three police cars, so complicated was it. That was bound to happen sooner, or later.

Now, the inevitable has happened. A passenger in a car travelling with his arm dangling out the window had it ripped off as the car passed too close to the side railing which acted like a razor blade. This is even worse than being the driver and was like just asking for it to happen. He was on the land side and he was not in control of the vehicle. Any movement by the driver to give more space to oncoming traffic could have been the cause of being right up against the railing. Apparently there was no damage to the car, so had the passenger had his arm in the car there would have been nothing to talk about. Now we have an example to quote to warn others not to do the same thing.

His arm was found and an attempt was considered for reattachment, however, it was too badly damaged and had to be discarded. So, this is a cautionary tale to us all.

Another thing that just has to happen will take place on an old fashioned train where you can open the windows and stick your head out to get a better view. Ugh!

Copyright (c) 2014  Eugene Carmichael