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Sunday, November 23, 2008

The Monster in the Mirror



“Images in mirror may be closer than they appear.”
This warning appears on most car mirrors, but was never more pertinent than on the car mirror that was being chased by a dinosaur in the film, Jurassic Park. However, I’m not talking about those types of monsters, simply other cars that share the road with us.

We’ve all had the experience of driving along in the far left lane when suddenly there appears in our mirror the image of a car coming up fast behind us. The driver clearly wants to get past and he’s (it’s usually a he) in a real hurry. Most people feel something of a start upon being in this position and panic. We pull over to the side as quickly as possible to let the speed freak get by.

Driving these days is a whole lot about being able to keep your nerve, and frankly being a bit bloody minded. When driving the motorway and occupying the extreme left hand lane we are only obliged to maintain a maximum speed of 120 km/h. We need only be in that lane when overtaking and when that manoeuvre is complete we need to return to the right hand lane promptly to comply with the rules of the road. However, the problem arises because the roads are occupied by a lot of fools who can only be pleased when the rest of us stay at home.

This is where the bloody-minded part comes in. We all pay for the privilege of using the roads, and the bit of space you are presently on is yours to occupy for the moment. It’s your little piece of real estate and it shouldn’t be given up easily.

I do admit however, that the sudden appearance in the mirror of something coming up from behind when I’m blocking its path and it wants to get by is reason for me to come back to reality from my daydreams of what I would do if I win the “El Gordo” lottery this year. That’s made even more threatening if he’s tailgating and flashing his lights. The problem also is the size of some of today’s cars.

Jeep has a very impressive front, as does the Volvo XC90, and the top of the line Chrysler saloon. The VW Taureg, Kia People Carriers, Land Rovers of any description, BMW X series, Mercedes, and so on. The biggest monster of all that you really don’t want to suddenly find hot on your heels is the giant Hummer from America. People who drive these things are boldly advertising to the world that “I am a person who definitely has far more money that sense.” I have seen them transporting the kids to school. Give me a break! Their petrol bill for just getting out of the driveway would put most of us in the poor house.

It’s quite something to be able to show off and laud it all over everybody else when you’re up high in one of those things, however, most of us are muttering to ourselves, “so, that’s what a drug dealer looks like!” What a Bummer to be in a Hummer!

Copyright © 2008 Eugene Carmichael

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