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Sunday, May 27, 2012

The Lady in her Wheelchair




Life in a wheelchair. This should not happen if it can be avoided!

For about seven years I have noticed a very beautiful lady making her way around the town in her wheelchair. She is always alone. At times she will enter a shop if it is possible for the wheelchair, and she conducts herself quietly and with dignity. What, I wondered, was her story?

Finally, I noticed that she was sitting at a table at a bar having a quiet cup of coffee, so I got up my nerve and spoke to her and asked if I could join her. She was somewhat taken aback by having a black man addressing her and asking to sit at her table. It was probably because she was so stuck for words that she nodded her head in the right way to note agreement, although she may have meant the opposite.

Thus began a conversation that took place more than a year ago, that so captivated me and moved me to the core, that I have simply held it within myself, and thought about it over and over again.

She is a married woman with children, who is sentenced to a wheelchair for the rest of her life because of a young man who drove his car at top speed while drunk.  Her husband recovered completely from his injuries, but she, and the boy driver are confined to wheelchairs until they die. Lately, we have been seeing groups of young people getting together for drinking parties where the idea is to simply get legless. The problem arises when many of these same people get in their cars to drive some place else.

It is such people to whom I am directing my comments.

First, I must confess, with eternal shame, that I have driven my car while under the influence of alcohol. I can only say that I was very lucky not to have caused anyone any harm, or even death. But, that was sheergood luck, because there was absolutely nothing that I did to avoid such an incident.

Many years later, my wife and I came within a hare's breath of ending up as victims of a driver who was reckless. That may have been Karma saying, "what goes around, comes around."

The lady told me of her suffering and described what a typical day is like for her. She admits that she very rarely has a conversation with people because she has a reputation for being stand-offish, simply because she is still learning to live with her life sentence. People passing our table looked on in great curiousity because they never saw her in the company of anyone simply chatting. That she was doing so in the company of a black man was of real interest.

I have seen her several times since when she is always on the move. We speak pleasently and have a very short chat, but the memories come flooding back to remind me that she needs help with everything. She only has her mobility and independence when she is in her motorized chair. She does have something of a life with her husband and her children, but always shared from her chair. All because a young driver had the very bad luck to slam into she and her husband while he was deliberately out of control.

At least the young man is experienceing something similar to her own agony, but I sensed that is very cold comfort. So, I appeal to my readers to think responsibily before operating a vehicle. Tell yourself that you must be free from any influence that will diminish your capabilities. Wait until you arrive home to have a drink. This is as much for your benefit as the general public's.

You know that this advice is good! You know that I am right in what I say! I'm sure you have no quarrel with it, but when you are under pressure with your friends the test will come. The interesting thing is that since I have been disavowing alcohol if I have to drive, not one person has lately tried to convince me to do otherwise. Bartenders say they don't blame me; my wife encourages me, and my friends will not give me a drink if I ask for it. They key is to not drink and drive. If you end up drinking, simply sleep it off in a hotel, or even in the car. Do whatever it takes to avoid starting up your car.

I don't have anybody's injuries or death on my concience, and I thank God that is so, because if it were otherwise, I simply don't know how I could cope. One more thing: the lady is only 45 years of age. The young man is even younger.


Copyright (c)   2012   Eugene Carmichael 

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