General Motors and All that Jazz

We have been hearing for some time that automakers in the United States have been facing some very difficult times. They have been before the U.S. Senate asking for government funding to keep them afloat. Originally their request was denied, however former president Bush signed an executive order appropriating funds to assist them. However, General Motors are now saying that was not enough, and that their problems are so deep seated that they are seriously facing bankruptcy.

The three major automakers in the U.S. are GM, Ford, and Chrysler. Together, with smaller parts makers, they are the most labour intensive industry in the United States. The consequences of GM closing are the same as the sky falling. It simply cannot be imagined.

U.S. automakers are in large part their own worst enemy. They have failed to make good, fuel economy cars that Americans want to buy. That gave an opportunity to Japanese firms to satisfy that market, resulting in the loss of that market to the Big Three. But the problem that they now face is common to all automakers, in that as people lose their jobs, or watch a shrinking economy, car sales have fallen like a heavy rock.

Many of their workers have already been sent home as they are overproducing inventory that no one is buying. A complete closure would add so many people to the unemployed roster as to spell complete disaster.

Filmmakers have put their imagination to work in creating disaster films where people live like rats in underground sewers and abandoned buildings without law and order.

As a reality, is this so difficult to imagine? Stay tuned!

Copyright © 2009 Eugene Carmichael

The Annual Examination

Here in Spain the examination of your vehicle is undertaken by the ITV, which means Inspeción Tecnica Vehiculo. This is a private business that works in concert for the government, something that we call a Quango in the U.K. The government here would say that it has outsourced the problem.

I have written about annual examinations before, and I return briefly to say that life has gotten a little bit better as they streamline their operations. Now, you can make an appointment on-line for your annual inspection. Instead of showing up without an appointment you can now show up at the designated time and be seen to within a reasonable waiting period.

Normally, this is a very painful experience that takes up to two hours of staying with your vehicle and moving it forward one car space at a time. Taxi drivers demanded that the system be improved so that they need not spend two hours going through this twice a year.

So, the appointment system was created for them, but other people saw what was happening and spoke up in indignation. In response the opportunity has been thrown open to everyone, but amazingly most people still prefer to go and simply wait the two, or more hours.

I expect the system will catch on. Then it will change into one whereby it will be difficult to get an appointment unless booking a year ahead.

Good Luck!

Copyright © 2009 Eugene Carmichael

Goodbye Old Friend

Well, it’s taken me five years to do it, but I finally called in the grua to take away our1992 Fiat Tempra station wagon. It has sat around on the property all that time as a good and faithful friend. Every time that I went to run the engine it answered promptly, even though the spiders took it over as their own home. It developed that old person smell after a while, as compared to the new car smell, so we knew it was getting along in age.

We stopped driving it because it developed a problem of jack-rabbiting, or hiccupps that absolutely no mechanic in the land was able to clear up. They could alleviate the effects a bit, but the problem always came back again. To say that it was embarrassing is an understatement. Finally, we bought another car and simply parked the Fiat and forgot about it.

I did start it periodically to keep the battery charged, and then, after about a year of this I decided that it was time to get rid of it. So, I started it up and moved it and the problem was no longer in evidence, and was never experienced again. It seems that all it needed was a vacation. However, to pass it through itv it would also have needed a few other things done to it that would have probably cost more than we could have sold it for.

So, with reluctance and a heavy heart I called in the grua and we drove it on to the truck, I gave it a pat on its rump to say “farewell and thank you”, and it was gone.
It’s funny how attached we can become to things. A car is supposed to be an inanimate object, but once we turn the key it bursts forth into life and becomes something full of energy. We call our cars names, even some not-so-polite ones, but that has the effect of endearing them to us. It might be an SOB, but it’s my SOB.

So Fiat Tempra V-7964-EB, wherever you are, you are gone but not forgotten.

Copyright © 2009 Eugene Carmichael

Games Drivers Play

I can’t say that I actually enjoy driving, but I do enjoy the right to get up and go when I wish, and the facility of getting from point “A” to point “B” at my own leisure. In fact, while making my journeys I can get quite a bit bored, especially when going over the same territory every day. So, I like so many other people turn to simple games, or worse, daydreaming about what I will do with my winnings from the lottery.

That’s not good because sometimes you get into your own little world and fail to take in all the details that are necessary. I try to avoid that, but a simple little game of taking note of car license plates is harmless enough.

You may have noticed that here in Spain the numbering system employs four digits numerals. These range from 0000 to 9999. Therefore, there are 9999 vehicles in each grouping, followed by alphabet letters to denote the number grouping. What I mean by that is, the first grouping would have been 0000 to 9999 –A. There would have been 26 groups of single letter plates. At the front of the series would be the community letter. Thus, V-9999-A was a vehicle that was registered in the Valencia community, and was the last one in that series.

It is always a joy for me to spot a car with a single letter. It will be a very old car, because when you buy a new car you usually have to accept the new registration number.

Once all the single letters were issued they moved on to double letter series, repeating the same formula. Now three letters are being employed. I have already seen CNT and FCK. I can’t wait for the four-letter series.

The Spanish DGT (Trafico) had its origins in 1778 under Royal Decree that gave it it’s mandate. The General Rules of the Road (las normativos) were not formed until 1899. The original speed limits were 28km/h on roads between towns, and 15 km/h in town. In Valencia City that speed has hardly increased on most days. Some times, on average it has decreased.

The first car in Europe was created in 1769 for a man named Nicolas Joseph Cugnot. It was operated on steam and was invented by a man named James Walt.

The modern car had its birth in Germany in 1886. It was developed by Karl benz and Gottlieb Daimeler. The original matricula was PM-1. I suppose if that was in Britain it might have meant Prime Minister.

So, my game continues to be trying to make something of license plates. I am reminded of people whom I know back in Bermuda when I see their license plate numbers, and I can also make up words by adding the missing letter.

I agree its silly, but it keeps me sane.

Copyright © 2009 Eugene Carmichael

Daddy, What can you See?

Get ready for this!

This is about road traffic jams.

We all have experienced them at one time or another. Some people have to go through it every day. How tiresome must that be? The equivalent scare word to Boo! to motorists must surely be “Road Works Ahead!” The problem is that as each country tries to work itself out of its economic problems there will be lots of make-work projects like roads to be built or repaired or hedges trimmed, and a lot of that work will be carried out by previously high priced executives.

The one thing that will be common is that we the motorists will pay dearly with our patience. Those people who have nowhere to go will stay at home rather than go through all that business of just sitting in your car while craning their necks trying to see what the problem is.

The types of problems that we consider legitimate that make us late for work are crashes. The bigger the crash the more we have to enlarge on when we finally get to work. Even events that take place on the opposite lane can have the effect of causing a tailback on our side. People tend to have to rubberneck to see what’s going on. The result often is accidents happen on our side as we drive into one another.

There was once a major fire along the highway most travelled by me. It was in a large warehouse with lots of attending firemen. Nothing to do with traffic but lines formed for miles as we all had to get a snapshot on our mobile phones.

I have learnt a lesson that I try to live by, but not everybody agrees that if I have an important appointment I should leave lots of time for getting there to try and take account of possible traffic jams. Once I am parked and outside my destination I can always go and get a coffee or read a newspaper.

My big question about traffic jams is that men, and only men seem to have to get out of the car to see what’s happening. Women don’t do this. It is only a man thing. In the history of driving no man has ever answered the question “What’s the problem, Daddy?” with anything other than “I don’t know!”

Funny, don’t you think?

Copyright © 2009 Eugene Carmichael

Driving Music

Is it just me, or are you too affected by your choice of music while driving?

The radio/cd player is an integral part of the safety features of your car. It is there not just to entertain you, but more importantly to avoid the driver falling asleep through boredom. It is as much a part of the safety features as a good set of tyres, and it should be used with common sense.

Especially when engaging on long drives it should be employed for its prime use. The problem arises in the choice of music to listen to, and this is where the human factor comes in, and is as variable as the weather. The objective is to stop yourself falling asleep, so your choice of artist is completely up to the individual.

My favourite group are The Toasters, a popular Ska Band of very long standing. Their music is so good and so pumped up that it is impossible to fall asleep. The problem is that they are such high energy that I find my foot pressing the accelerator too much. I actually drive faster than I would without their influence. The opposite occurs when listening to music with a calming effect. On a long journey that is actually dangerous.

The best choice for me is a disc with various artists presenting a wide variety of songs. If I start to get going too fast another selection with a more calming effect will bring me back to my senses. My Volvo sound system is very good, and some songs just beg to be blasted as they are so powerful. This is a mistake to do in a moving vehicle because with the windows rolled up you will not be able to hear any road sounds. Naturally, we need to hear sirens and other warning sounds.

This may be considered as a cautionary tale to be careful when mixing driving with music. The worst case would be to collide with another vehicle and your music just keeps on pumping.

Copyright (c) 2009 Eugene Carmichael

The Crisis Bites Hard

The economic crisis is hitting Spain very hard. Some say that the effect is being felt harder in this economic zone, especially if we look to the rising tide of unemployed. For a little background perspective we need look no further that the building industry.

When we arrived here ten years ago crime, especially against homes was flourishing. So many people were without work that if you had a home and others didn’t, you were considered fair game. Then came the change from pesetas to euros. That had the effect of forcing a mountain of money out into the open. It had been a form of national sport to cheat the taxman, so money that was held in cash behind all that ironwork covering doors and windows of people’s homes had to be converted into euros. Simply taking it to the bank was not an option as the game would have been exposed. Instead, people did a very strange thing with it: they bought property and built towers for business or for homes, and they also bought expensive cars and yachts, etc. In other words, secret money was turned into very obvious things.

However, the building boom didn’t stop once the changeover to the euro was complete. New developments continued at an alarming pace. The value of real estate rocketed and a lot of people got very rich in the process. Personally, I could not see what was driving the runaway development. It was all around us in our little town of L’Eliana. So much new building was taking place at the same time, the sky was dotted with building cranes, as though they were television antennas.

When I asked who would inhabit all the new buildings people would simply shrug their shoulders. It was hoped that people from Madrid would invest their money in second homes that gave them access to the beaches of Valencia, but other than that there was a definite shortage of warm bodies.

But now all of that has come to a grinding halt. Many building projects have simply been put on hold until circumstances allow for their completion, and new projects are simply not being started except in very few cases. Added to all of that misery is the huge inventory of unsold properties.


That has led to the loss of so many jobs that were held by workers directly involved in building, as well as those in support. This does not augur well for Spain. It suggests coming days of darkness in the near future. Many people who came to Spain in search of work from elsewhere in Europe have either returned home or gone to other countries. Needless to say crime is on the upsurge.

One sector that is being hit hard is that involving driving licenses. Driving schools are seeing their student enrolments falling off. To keep their customers the schools are having to allow credit terms. I have just read that proof of the situation can be seen clearly in the examination centre at El Saler in Valencia where crowds of people would be found all day to take their theory exams or their practicals. Apparently, now by noontime the place is deserted.

The irony is that Trafico has been making it ever more difficult for people to get a pass. Now it seems that circumstances external have taken over that limit the number of new drivers on the road. However, that only means that there will be fewer legal drivers, although to be caught driving without a permit and/or insurance means going straight to jail from the car.


Copyright © 2009 Eugene Carmichael

The Perfect Student Driver

To the Perfect Student Driver-Congratulations!

Our son, Nathaniel, came home today and declared that he had passed his practical driving test for a car license. I might have been terrified had he his eyes on my car, however I drive a Volvo so I don’t have to worry, but his mother drives a Seat Leon so I think she may be a little concerned. Maybe that’s why in a week’s time he will be off to Australia.

Most parents complain when they are caught up in the act of providing taxi services for their children, but they forget that there is something even worse that’s to come. That is when the kids get their own driving permits.

This is intended to be a homage to our son because he has a perfect record in the matter of gaining his permits to travel independent of us. First there was the case of getting a permit to ride a moped when he was fourteen. That really did not require much from him at all. But that’s the problem, very young children go out on the road on their slow moving mopeds, and far too many don’t get to grow up.

Next came his desire to move up to 125 cc motorbikes. To do that he was required to sit a theory examination that was in two parts. The first part was regarding the motorcycle aspect, and the second part was for motor-cars. I don’t know what the thinking is other than perhaps he will be circulating along motorways and should know the rules for that. Both examinations must be sat on the same day at different times. Most people fail them both, or pass one and fail the other. Nathaniel passed them both on the first try.

Then came the practical test for the bike that was difficult enough then, but has become even more difficult today. He passed that on the first try. So far, so good! He is showing off his Carmichael mettle.

That was almost two years ago. He has had to wait until attaining his eighteenth birthday before he could go anywhere trying his hand at driving a car. Having already passed the theory test he had only to successfully complete the car practical. He has worked hard, both with myself and with the driving instructor from the school. Here in Spain we are not allowed to enter the road system with a student driver, as is the case in Britain. Therefore, experience comes very expensively as every time out has to be paid for. There are so many little things that can go wrong to trip the student up.

The first one is nerves. Even I, a veteran driver of over 50 years felt a rush of nerves as I thought wouldn’t it be so embarrassing if I were to fail after having been a driver for so long. The fact is that most experienced people would fail had they to take a new test. We build up such a list of bad habits and they come into play when the driving gets tough. Those are the things the examiner looks for in such drivers.

I digress to tell the tale of the lady friend who had to be tested for a Spanish license and just couldn’t get a passing grade. So, on her fourth try she had a vodka and tonic before the test and sailed right through.

There were several things that conspired to foul me when I was being tested. Firstly the examiner had me turn left through a purpose built break in the median, something I would never do on my own, but I did it to his satisfaction. Then, while driving along the one-way street I came upon a truck parked partly on a pedestrian crossing. I couldn’t see whether anyone was using it so I stopped as though it was in use. Just as well as out stepped a lady while I was stationary. Then as I proceeded a small dog ran out between the cars, but my calm speed made sure I was not going to hit it. Then, I had to turn away from the lane that I had been instructed to drive as the police had cordoned it off, and that put me in a proper fix to get back on track. But, all was accomplished with aplomb as I had long stopped worrying about my passenger.

For our son to pass his practical on the first try gave him a perfect track record, which is something of a rarity, and for us we are so very proud of him. That augurs well for his chosen path in life. At the moment he is keen of working in medicine. It is clear to us that when he puts his mind to something he can get it right.

So I think that we can expect great things from our young man. Australia will help to shape him and the future for him looks rosy and bright. I think he can be whatever he decides he wants to be.

Good luck Nathaniel! We love you and you do us proud!


Copyright © 2009 Eugene Carmichael

Another Cautionary Tale

Driving in Spain

A friend called me recently while somewhat distressed. A Guardia Civil officer was in the process of writing her a ticket because she was carrying something in her boot that was too large, and consequently she was travelling with the boot open. It was on this basis that she was fined. However, a re-reading of the Highway Code does not show this as an offence. Fundamentally, the law wants us to employ a van or truck when we have items of such volume that would make this necessary and common sense. We are allowed to carry certain goods on the top of our cars, even if they protrude to the front and extend to the back.

What then is so special about travelling only with the boot firmly closed? The answer could be that under such circumstances the car is pulling inside poisonous carbon monoxide. However, this can be offset somewhat by opening all the car windows so that it won’t likely kill those inside, but nonetheless an effect could be that of impairing the driver’s concentration.

We cannot see any other reason for the officer making out a ticket, so perhaps he was in reality making an effort to save the lives of people. I’m sure that the way things work in Spain not every officer would see this as an offence, but it is worth be aware that unlike England and America where no one thinks twice about driving with the boot open, but Spain is apparently different.

Copyright © 2009 Eugene Carmichael

Yes! We Can!

Our pledge to make 2009 the year of the least number of collisions.

Yes! We Can!

The world seems to be falling apart before our very eyes. Everywhere we look, in the financial sector, the political sector, socially, in religion, and anywhere else, things that can be called traditional are breaking down. However, there is one area that each of us have the power within our grasp to affect. We can determine that we are not going to become a mere statistic this year, nor are we going to put others in that category. No one else can drive for us therefore it is up to us to do it right. Stay off the mobile phone while underway in your car. Mankind was not made to always be contactable. Turn the thing off and relax and concentrate on what you are doing behind the wheel.

Never allow yourself to become drowsy while driving. Stop and rest. Better still, get a good night’s rest beforehand and eat lightly while completing your voyage. Never drink alcohol or take drugs, legal or otherwise, that will impair your judgment. If you don’t want to do these things for yourself, do them for that one special person for whom the sun shines from your eyes.

Try not to overtake along two-way road systems just because you are impatient with the slow pace of the driver in front of you. Head-on collisions happen on such roads and can be avoided completely if you practise patience.

If you are a cyclist or a motorcyclist and you want to avoid being hit by a motorist who “just didn’t see you” wear a reflective jacket over your other gear. “Be Seen to be Safe.”

When you find yourself saying that it’s just too much trouble to do any of these things, repeat after me: “Yes! We Can! “Yes! I can!”

Copyright © 2009 Eugene Carmichael

The Overtaken

Everbody overtakes me! Driving on Spanish roads it seems no matter how quickly or slow I’m driving, I get overtaken. I’m no slouch, but even at 120 there’s a constant parade of cars going past me as though I have my brakes on.

Well, I’m sorry, but I just won’t drive at a speed greater than 120 in a 120 zone. I just can’t get my head around why people seem to think that driving at 180 is just fine. I think it important to remember that practically every collision involves too much speed. That does not necessarily mean that it was a case of exceeding the posted speed limit. It just means that there was too much speed for the circumstances at the time.

Driving along country roads at night that are not lit by road lights should encourage the driver to reduce speed. But no, for many, it means light traffic indicates I can go as fast as I want.

Wet road conditions suggests to common sense to reduce speed. For many drivers it appears that they are desperately trying to make up the extra time spent in bed by pushing hard to get there on time. Many do not arrive at all. That wouldn’t be so bad by itself, but they too often take others with them. I hope people are allowed to fight in the after-life.

I have no intention of changing the way I drive. Fundamentally I try not to exceed the posted limit by more than ten kilometres because I get to pass in case of speed traps. But, it boggles my mind when I see drivers treating police officers in their official cars in the same way they treat me. It appears that they are simply not there, and to make matters worse I have never seen a patrol car go after one of these speed demons.

So maybe it’s just me after all. If you are one of those people to go flying past me, you might like to wish me to have a good day, preferably by not showing me the middle finger.

Happy Motoring!

Copyright © 2008 Eugene Carmichael

Stupidity Once More

I wrote a couple of weeks ago that I thought that if stupidity could be eliminated from our roads so would what we call accidents. And then I witnessed an incident of stupidity so grave, so outrageous, that if I had the power I would have liked to have caught up with the cretin responsible, and at that point I would have pointed out to him that he had provided evidence that he was so stupid as to be a clear and present danger against all humankind. I then would have placed a bullet between his blank eyes.

The incident took place on a roundabout that is encountered when exiting a motorway. The roundabout is also used as part of the system to enter the motorway. There were four cars involved. I was car number one; the car ahead of me was car number two. We were both using the left hand lane of the two-lane roundabout. Car number three was an Audi that entered the roundabout in spite of the presence of the two of us. That was the first stupid thing to happen, although not particularly dangerous. Car number four, a red Volkswagon also decided to squeeze on to the roundabout. The Audi took the first exit and was gone. The red car increased its speed and inserted itself across the path of the car ahead of me, just as that driver was about to cross over to the right hand lane to leave the roundabout.

No collision occurred, but the margin between the two cars must have been so small I wouldn’t have tried to pass a slip of paper between them. The other driver didn’t even touch his brakes as it happened all so very fast, but I’m fairly certain there would have been a lot of cursing in that car.

The most awful part of this scene is that had a broadside collision occurred, when the police attended they would have applied the blame on the driver who was ahead of me, as the law states that no car may lawfully leave a roundabout at the expense of impeding the progress of the car in the right-hand lane. For red car driver to have deliberately inserted himself in that position takes the act of stupidity to a very high art.

That bothered me intensely, and every time after that when I came on to that roundabout I remembered the incident. About ten days later, while being on the roundabout in the left-hand lane, as I approached the point at which traffic from the motorway should have come to a halt, another dopey driver shot out alongside me and sped up to get ahead of me so that he could do the exact same thing as red car driver. That did enrage me, but it also taught me a lesson. In order to control such morons, and apparently there are more than one on our roads, I need to take charge of the right hand lane as soon as possible and to hold my ground.

As for yourself, you may wish to take this as a reasonable warning.

Copyright © 2008 Eugene Carmichael

Parking in the Blue Zone

I suppose you could say that as part of my research I was issued a ticket for parking in a blue zone without paying the twenty cents for a half hour. But I was just running to the ATM at the bank. How long would that take? Long enough for the warden, who was evidently near enough to have watched my actions to write out a ticket for a 20 euro fine.

I was back in minutes, and there to greet me was my ticket. A kind stranger gave me this advice, and I’m sharing it with you, dear reader, as like most English residents of Valencia we don’t have a clue about these things.

There is s facility whereby if you come back to your car within one hour of the tickets having been written, you can “anul la denuncia” by paying 4:00 euros into the machine on the spot, instead of the 20 euros that it would otherwise cost. Following the instructions you will push the button on the top for tarifas and the screen will give you the option to cancel the ticket. Pay in the four euros, then push the button towards the bottom to receive your receipt.

At the end of the receipt there is a part that you are expected to clip off with scissors so that you can retain it for your records. (No problem this as we all walk about with a pair of scissors for just this purpose.)

Put the receipt with the parking ticket and place in the envelope supplied. Then, at the base of the machine there is a small box into which you can insert the envelope. And that should be the end of it.

However, my ticket was issued on a windy nasty night, I tried reading the instructions in the dark that were first in Valenciano; and the box is so well hidden that at night it is invisible. During the day it can be found.

I am usually so good about paying to park in these zones as they are usually the concession of a charity. On this occasion I neglected to do so and turned an expense of 20 cents into four euros. I hope I won’t be required to pay anything additional as I left the scene before depositing the envelope. I went back the next day and did that, so I might not be out of the woods yet.

A country that gives discounts on fines is a country that loves a bargain.

Copyright © 2008 Eugene Carmichael

What’s Normal?

On Wednesday, 26th November, 2008 a student driver went to the Realistic Driving school in Petrer, Alicante Province, Spain to have a driving lesson. He had already done the exercises whereby he had learnt the co-ordination things about clutch and brake and accelerator. Today was going to take things up a notch, for today he would go out on the road for the first time.

To say that our young eighteen-year old was excited was an understatement, but he was a fast learner and he took in the counsel of his instructor well. He had been told that there are only two types of actual accidents. They are (a) when a wild animal plunges into the path of an oncoming vehicle and they collide, that is deemed an accident because the animal cannot be blamed. The second type occurs when a driver is overcome by a major sneeze. We cannot sneeze with our eyes open, and a sneeze has a mind of its own. We don’t have to have an actual cold in order for this to happen, so very often these things come to us out of the blue.

Everything else has a fault attached to it. Someone did something that they ought not to have done, or they didn’t do as they were supposed to do. Possibly the collision occurred as a result of bad road engineering or faulty design of the vehicle itself. Examine the circumstances of collisions, large and small and you will be able to lay the blame on someone. In the United States that someone gets to be sued.

After preparing properly the instructor said something else that is very important: he said that in driving, if we can anticipate that something will, or could happen, when it does we can be ready for it to the best of our ability. This day would not tax our young student very much as they would only drive around the block so that he got a feel for being in a real life situation.

They left the driving school parking lot, turned right and proceeded to the traffic lights at the junction. When it was possible they turned right onto the main road and proceeded to pass Cam Bank. At the bank, a bit of excitement was taking place that our student driver was unaware of. Two would-be armed robbers were in the bank. Their names were Mr. Dumb, and his accomplice; Mr. Dumber. Mr. Dumb had been in the process of trying to get the manager to open up the safe, but in spite of taking a beating he refused to do so.

In the process the alarm was sent and the bank became surrounded by police. Mr. Dumb decided that things were not going at all as planned, and so he decided to make a run for it and he came out blazing, wounding four people. He ran into the street in front of the approaching student driver and he fell, promptly got up and pointed his pistol at the police who took him down in a hail of bullets that crossed just in front of the car’s windscreen. It would have been much simpler had he simply dropped his pistol and raised his hands.

The student driver slowed, then he remembered that he had an accelerator and pressed down hard. The car gave out a great cloud of smoke and leapt forward and he was gone. Reportedly he didn’t stop until the car ran out of fuel, somewhere near Madrid.

He apologised to the instructor for getting so rattled as he understood that he failed to anticipate that happening. He thought that for Realistic Driving to go to such lengths was incredibly good training, and that if he decided to continue to drive he would have to get tougher and more accepting of what was normal. Perhaps, he said, he might just leave the driving to his mother and father.

Meanwhile, back at the bank Dumber thought that he needed to be someplace else so in order to get out he would use the multitude of hostages under his command. “Now listen up, you lot. We’re all going to move to the door and you will surround me as we go outside.” Problem: the maximum number of people who could pass through the door at one time was two. He was pretty sure that if he allowed the hostages to go ahead of him they would bolt, so he would go first with a hostage and the others would follow.
As he passed through the door some smart ass locked it and everybody scattered.

“Mi carga en la leche!” he swore. “OK friend, it’s you and me.” But as they moved forward the hostage tripped him and fell to the ground leaving Dumber fully exposed. So, did he drop his pistol and reach for the sky? No, he did not. He thought of himself as Butch Cassiday and started shooting and that was met with a predictable response. He was not immediately killed, but instead he was taken off to hospital suffering from too much lead in his system.

Of course I have made up certain aspects of this story, however there was an actual daylight robbery attempt and the bandits were shot by the police in front of a passing driving school car.

I would just love to hear the driver’s actual impression.

Copyright © 2008 Eugene Carmichael

The Monster in the Mirror

“Images in mirror may be closer than they appear.”

This warning appears on most car mirrors, but was never more pertinent than on the car mirror that was being chased by a dinosaur in the film, Jurassic Park. However, I’m not talking about those types of monsters, simply other cars that share the road with us.

We’ve all had the experience of driving along in the far left lane when suddenly there appears in our mirror the image of a car coming up fast behind us. The driver clearly wants to get past and he’s (it’s usually a he) in a real hurry. Most people feel something of a start upon being in this position and panic. We pull over to the side as quickly as possible to let the speed freak get by.

Driving these days is a whole lot about being able to keep your nerve, and frankly being a bit bloody minded. When driving the motorway and occupying the extreme left hand lane we are only obliged to maintain a maximum speed of 120 km/h. We need only be in that lane when overtaking and when that manoeuvre is complete we need to return to the right hand lane promptly to comply with the rules of the road. However, the problem arises because the roads are occupied by a lot of fools who can only be pleased when the rest of us stay at home.

This is where the bloody-minded part comes in. We all pay for the privilege of using the roads, and the bit of space you are presently on is yours to occupy for the moment. It’s your little piece of real estate and it shouldn’t be given up easily.

I do admit however, that the sudden appearance in the mirror of something coming up from behind when I’m blocking its path and it wants to get by is reason for me to come back to reality from my daydreams of what I would do if I win the “El Gordo” lottery this year. That’s made even more threatening if he’s tailgating and flashing his lights. The problem also is the size of some of today’s cars.

Jeep has a very impressive front, as does the Volvo XC90, and the top of the line Chrysler saloon. The VW Taureg, Kia People Carriers, Land Rovers of any description, BMW X series, Mercedes, and so on. The biggest monster of all that you really don’t want to suddenly find hot on your heels is the giant Hummer from America. People who drive these things are boldly advertising to the world that “I am a person who definitely has far more money that sense.” I have seen them transporting the kids to school. Give me a break! Their petrol bill for just getting out of the driveway would put most of us in the poor house.

It’s quite something to be able to show off and laud it all over everybody else when you’re up high in one of those things, however, most of us are muttering to ourselves, “so, that’s what a drug dealer looks like!” What a Bummer to be in a Hummer!

Copyright © 2008 Eugene Carmichael

Billboards

As though we are not busy enough trying to safely navigate our way through the heavy traffic loads, thousands of merchants place their messages, which they seem to think are s-o-o-o important, right where they will distract us the most. The roadsides are becoming so fully lined with these idiotic signs that if you did what they are suggesting and read each one, it would be like reading the newspaper while driving. How on earth are you supposed to drive with due care and caution if you are supposed to pay attention to these things?

Firstly, I have some news for the advertisers who pay good money to hire these board spaces: I have never been persuaded to buy one single solitary thing by a billboard message, and I feel so bloody minded about them that I never will.

For the purposes of this piece I stopped my car, got out to actually take note of what the advertisers want me to see. Well, just how important are these messages. Upon entering L’Eliana from the CV-35 we are confronted by nothing but boards. The fact that most of these boards are on the first major roundabout is not lost on drivers. We are wondering who on earth approved these things in the exact worst spot one can imagine.

There is one for Bingo Osito. Somewhere in the shopping centre at El Osito is a Bingo hall and they would like all of us to change direction and come play Bingo with them. I don’t think so! The people who are into that sort of thing know they are there.

Corporea Wellness Club would like to welcome us into their group. Well, good health is important, but if I’m trying to read their board and I run into the car in front of me, that will do nothing to promote my good health.

The Music Escuela, “Musicorum” really want us to come learn to play the guitar. Can’t that wait? Peralta Fabrica de Compras seem to be trying to sell us something. You won’t be able to figure out what while on the move. A lot of good that’s doing!

Decathalon have just opened a huge new shop on the opposite side of the road to the entrance to L’Eliana. The building is impossible not to see when entering and leaving L’Eliana. So, do they really need to place their message on billboards so close to their store? Also, Leroy Merlin operates a massive presence within El Osito, and very close to it there’s a billboard announcing I should come and shop with them. The billboard nearly obscures the store when you catch the angle just right.

I stood in front of a board advertising “Olvidate”, that’s “forget about it” when translated. A very good idea because I can’t figure out what this wants me to do other than forget it. Mark that one done.

There’s also one advertising J&B Scotch, which I do drink, and Rokelin, who offer the taste of something or other.

The one that tops them all is the sign for the Blue Sex Factory that suggests gifts for mujeres and couples. Nothing for guys? That’s one thing about the culture in Spain that I do appreciate, and that is the healthy attitude towards sex. Here they seem to feel everyone should do it until well satisfied.

Anyway, you get the idea. However, this gets me going so much probably because I come from an island where billboard advertising is simply not allowed. Neither are neon lit signs, and there are size restrictions on business names that are fixed to their buildings. I’m actually irritated by all this clutter, so much so that when I’m driving out of it and into the country where there is nothing of the sort I feel a big relief.

I do know about subliminal suggestions that give a person ideas that he is not aware he has taken on, but I can assure all of those responsible for the above mess, they have utterly failed to sell me anything. Where I have bought something that they sell it was because of entirely different reasons. I might even consider penalizing advertisers who spoil the environment by not supporting them.

So, to the Minister(s) responsible I say, clean up this act. No-one is going to go to sleep while driving because they don’t have anything to read.

Copyright © 2008 Eugene Carmichael

Lewis "One Point" Hamilton

I’m convinced that this is a very extraordinary young man. In fact, he is not just an ordinary and average racing driver, I think he is the consummate entertainer. In his first year of racing this monster machine he lost the world championship by just one point.

At the start of this season he was unstoppable, taking one race after another. At one point we were all wondering whether this was Michael Schumacher over again, and fans began to give one giant yawn. But then, things started to go wrong for Lewis. He started to make mistakes. True, they were mistakes that everybody else make with routine monotony, but still it was Lewis himself who was making them. I thought he was bigger than that, but then I reminded myself that he was only human and as such he was subject to make mistakes.

Felipe Massa took advantage of every error on the part of Lewis to increase his total of points, and to cut the points gap between himself and Lewis. Then Lewis did something that I felt was along the same lines as Mike Tyson doing an ear bite: Lewis cut across a bend to get out in front of Felipe. I saw that as desperation, and the rules committee agreed. He did finish that race in first position but he was made subject to a time penalty and the first position went to Massa. Now, this was serious business, and I, along with everybody else sat upright and started to worry.

If Lewis was to have a real chance to win the championship he would have to pull up his socks and start to work his magic. But, not so fast, Fernando Alonso had something to say about that. He got his winning ways back and finished a couple of races in first position. Perhaps we were seeing in Lewis a young man who had peaked.

We saw something like that in Tiger Woods. That first year that he won the Masters Tournament in America was an amazing thing to watch. He was masterful and hypnotic. I had gone to a golf club on some other business. I walked into the lounge that was as quiet as an empty church, although every table was full. Someone made a telephone call to a golfing buddy who was out on the course, suggesting that he might like to abandon the round and get back to the clubhouse pronto. For a while Tiger continued his dominance, but then he started to lose some games. So it was with Lewis.

The thing that Hamilton, Woods, and President-elect Barack Obama all have in common is that when they come under pressure they maintain their calm. However, as fans of Lewis Hamilton we were biting our nails and sitting forward on our seats. The points spread continued to narrow, but Lewis said that he was comfortable with that. But then, came the moment of truth, the final race of the season in Brasil. He was neither ruled out or in as the eventual winner ahead of the race. He could only pull off a win if he finished no lower than fifth place. But he had to finish, and a fifth place would give him a one-point lead over Massa, who was up in the front pack.

People all over the world watched that race who had never watched a Formula One race before, just as the same thing happened in golf, and in America’s presidential race for president. The tension around the world was so palpable that it could truly have been sliced with a knife. Nowhere was that more so than in the U.K. This was a chance for a British title, and in the history of the race, it was also a chance for the title to be taken home by a young black man for the very first time. To say that a lot was riding on the outcome is a true understatement.

Around and around they went and Lewis was nowhere near to where he needed to be. In the closing rounds of the race he made up ground and with only two more corners to go he was in sixth place. Disappointed fans began to turn their backs on the screens as they could not bear to watch his loss. But suddenly, the most enormous roar went up around the world that surely could have been heard in outer space. On the second to last corner Lewis found his opening and went for it in flawless style and crossed the bar in fifth place, one point ahead of Massa to win with a total of accumulated points for the season of 98, compared with 97 for Massa.

Britain shook with the excitement of the win, and even Her Majesty watched as he brought home the title. This was drama at its finest. It was the best of all that had gone before, so much so that few of us can remember who actually finished first on that day.

Lewis Hamilton is a very nice guy. He honours his family, his country, and his team. He is handsome and well spoken and the right sort of role model for a lot of young people who are otherwise following paths to hell. They can see that should they wish to turn their lives around they too can make something substantial of themselves. If only they would believe that, “Yes, we can!”

Lewis Hamilton, Driver, World Champion Formula One and great humanitarian. But how great is he really? Stay tuned for the 2009 Formula One racing season. We’ll see!

Copyright © 2008 Eugene Carmichael

117,000

Between 117,000 and 130,000, that’s the number of paid admissions to the Moto GP at Valencia’s Ricardo Tormo Cheste stadium on Sunday, October 26th. That was a day of great thrills and spills for the spectators and racers, but even more so for the organisers.

The event is an annual one at this same time of the year, but this year presented some very special problems brought about by heavy rains that had persisted for more than two weeks. The country had been experiencing the Gota Fria with all the usual floods and destruction. As an organiser that must have brought on many sleepless nights as to cater for so many people for an event of this magnitude must surely have been the ultimate nightmare. Even if the weather was cooperating perfectly there are so very many things that can go wrong.

The town of Cheste is usually a very quiet place. People go about their business, that is primarily agriculture and generally keep themselves to their own. But once or twice a year the racetrack draws half the world and their cousins and the town becomes overrun with the enthusiasm of racing fever. For the Grand Moto GP this is even further exaggerated as young people on their magnificent bikes come rolling into town like the thunder of the gods seeking fun. It seems to be an accepted thing that somebody has to die during the period.

This year, on the first of three days of racing and celebration, two people lost their lives. I’m not speaking of official racers, but spectators in attendance. The temptation to attract attention to one’s self during this time is very strong, so there is no shortage of guys showing off their shiny pride and joy. Unfortunately, sometimes things get out of hand and go horribly wrong. It’s hard to imagine how parents feel when told that they have lost their son or daughter at a time when they were only seeking to have fun.

To make matters worse for the organisers, this year the approach to the circuit was in the midst of hard major works as the new high-speed train from Madrid is in the process of being developed. Consequently, with temporary access of a very confusing nature the ability to cater to so much traffic was daunting. But even this was further complicated by the fact that the non-paved parking lots around the circuit were under water, so parking could not be allowed anyway.

Someone came up with the brilliant idea of having motor homes and cars to park about 20 minutes away and the occupants shifted by bus. Even under the best of circumstances this would not have worked very well, but that was before they knew that so many people would eventually show up.

Saturday it was still raining and the forecast was for more rain on Sunday. A disaster!

Sunday dawned dry and bright and it quickly became apparent that the day was going to be absolutely fabulous. So people who otherwise thought they might not bother got up early and headed for Cheste. The organisers panicked, but in a good way. They wisely concluded that the area around the stadium had to be made park-able, and they only had about an hour to get it done. Yes, it was impossible, but made even more so by arguing about it.

The trucks rolled and the heavy machinery scooped and smoothed and in one hour it was done. A calamity of superior proportions was avoided, and the young people arrived in just about everything that moved. 117,000 of them paid admission to the circuit producing several million in income for the track. That was 5,000 more than paid to see Formula One on the streets of Valencia. To say that this was unexpected is a great understatement.

In spite of all the excitement and the unabated testosterone the crowd behaved itself and all went off without any major hitches. Certainly you needed patience because of so many people just to get anything at all. The trains and buses did a roaring trade as a great many people heeded advice to leave their vehicles in Valencia.

I did not attend the races myself as I have been nursing a healing foot, but mid-afternoon I made my way over to Cheste, which is the next town to mine, to see how things were progressing. I arrived just as the races had ended and all those people were leaving. Now try to imagine that you are the only person going the wrong way.

Cheste survived another invasion, everyone had a great time it seems, and the papers and tv reports were glowing in their praise for the event. Young people arrived and camped out in the weather and did their fun thing which reminds me that young people are pretty wonderful. Is youth wasted on the young as someone once said? I think not, but would I like to be young again? Sounds like a lot of hard work to me.

Copyright (c) 2008 Eugene Carmichael

Spanish Parking

We drivers in Spain do not park our cars, instead we abandon them. Patience is not generally thought of as our long suite, so what happens usually is that we drive into the town centre to get as close to where we want to conduct business, and we park alongside the row of cars that is already there and try to be quick about getting things done.

For new comers and foreigners to Spain this is very difficult to understand. Where is the consideration for our fellow man? True, the unwritten rule is that if you are going to do this, you should leave your parking brake off so that your car can be moved forward or backward. Frankly, this is very dangerous. If the road surface has a gradual decline you are asking for trouble.

I once watched as a poor man came back to find that his car was hemmed in by a line of double-parked cars the entire length of the block. He didn’t have the time to wait for the owners to come back, so he started at the head of the line and moved that car out into the path of crossing traffic. One by one he moved all the cars that he needed in order to give himself an opportunity to leave. He was not gentle and several cars suffered scratches.

I find it very difficult to understand the mentality of people who are so self-serving that to lock in another motorist until the offending driver returns is off the radar of selfishness. However, it does seem to stop there. I have never seen a fight break out because of this. I think that you might be taking your life in your hands if you did such a thing in Los Angeles. What is going on here?

Well, first, there’s simply too much traffic inflicting itself in the downtown areas. People need to get in the habit of parking outside city limits and taking public transport into the heart of the city. We also have to learn that walking is good exercise. As a practical matter, if we can park a little farther away from our destination and walk the distance, we do our bodies good.

My general idea is to leave my car several kilometres outside town and ride the bus or metro. Parking in pay parking has grown so expensive as to be offensive. So, these places should be avoided as rip-off stations. Add to that they try to pack in as many cars as possible, and that leads many people to leave the colour of their cars behind.

Moving through the city is an interesting experience in seeing how far people are prepared to go to leave their cars for the duration. The space that is marked for pedestrians is heaven sent for so many drivers who say that if it were not for that they would not have any place to park.

Sidewalks provide much needed parking for off-road space, and any building lot not actively being worked on is welcome space. I recently saw one driver had pushed the edge of the envelope to the extreme by parking nose in between two cars. Very novel indeed!

One final thought: In many ways I recognize that I am becoming just like the Spanish. A case of "When in Spain do as the Spanish do?"

Copyright © 2008 Eugene Carmichael

Driving while Injured

The law states that you must not drive while impaired in any way. Apart from those people who are so moronic that they should not come anywhere near a vehicle, what does that statement actually mean?

An easy interpretation would be that if the driver is suffering in any way the use of his full faculties then he must not take up the position of controlling his vehicle. So, whether you have a hurt foot or arm or hand or eyesight, or anything of that sort, the edict is to take a break.

However, having said that we have driving by special disabled operators, so that seems to call into question whether every injury automatically bars driving. Certainly drunkenness or impairment through default of sight are clearly acceptable reasons why we need to stay away from trying to drive. Also, we have to acknowledge that disabled drivers usually have specially customized cars to assist them

What if we have an automatic car, can we still drive if we have injured our left foot? This is a foot that is simply not necessary for driving an automatic. But can we still drive a manual shift if we have sustained an injury to that foot. It really all depends on how severe the injury, as you certainly have to be able to apply the clutch.

If you have an injured right arm that disallows the changing of gears, can you cope? Doesn’t sound like it as you should never remove both hands from the steering wheel while in motion. I do recall seeing a man doing just that to have a mobile telephone conversation, but that’s as we say, another story.

What about the left arm injury? Can it be used to at least hold the steering wheel and to make turns, because if it cannot you will be taking an exceptional risks in going out into traffic.

I want to say that in the case of the sufferance of injury commonsense has a great role to play. Getting around by vehicle is such an important part of our every day life that sometimes stretching things may be necessary, however, should you ever have to make such a decision it is critical that you err on the side of safety. A reckless decision now might lead to horrific results later.


Copyright © 2008 Eugene Carmichael

Miles to Go!

“The woods are lovely, dark and deep
But I have promises to keep, and miles to go before I sleep,

And miles to go before I sleep.” (Frost)



We do a lot of driving, most of which is not an actual enjoyable experience, although being able to do so is a real privilege. My wife and I visited our friend, the fabulous Ms. G who lives in Ojen which is located just eight kilometros inland of Marbella. Ojen is a small white village that sits on the side of a mountain. It is very typical of so many villages but each has its own story.

Ojen was in fiestas and the party went on in spite of the uncooperative weather. There are very few flat parts to the village, and every thing is a mini of what Madrid or Valencia would have. It is a town of locals and others, and that is made very clear as the locals don’t go out of their way for us foreigners, however, we were perfectly free to roam about and to enjoy ourselves, which we did.

I did wonder what effect a hillside town has on its aging population. Do people live longer because of the strength they build from walking up such steep inclines, or do they depart this life at a younger age? That is the question.

Our hostess was very kind to take us on a long drive through country roads over the mountains, and that is what I want to share. Driving through cities and along the national or autovias is the fundamentals of getting from point A to point B. This was just pleasure driving, something we have to go out of our way to achieve.

For this excursion we travelled from Ojen further inland to Ronda to see the great Gorge. Our journey took us along the A355 to Monda, then via a shortcut through Guaro to pick up the A366 to Ronda. Along the way we passed through Tolox, Alozaina, Yunguera, and El Burgo where we stopped for a rest. These are all small towns but they seemed to be well ordered with a functioning society built around agriculture.

This was a delightful trip for us passengers but for the driver it requires full concentration on the road as it was a mountain route with narrow roads and hairpin bends all the way. We are therefore very grateful to our friend who did the driving.

Taking the route that we did meant having to cross the Sierra Bermeja. We went up one side, then along the top at 1190 meters above sea level, and down the other side. I thought it quite astonishing that so many people live in these wide-open spaces. Mainly it is olive country so I suppose that’s the principal reason why there is such a large population so far away from the major centres. By contrast the density of people living down along the coast is horrific. At one point I actually closed my eyes away from the obscenity of that sight.

I observed something on that journey that was really striking: you pass from deeply forested areas into sudden arid conditions where hardly anything at all grows. The line is quite rigidly drawn and seems preposterous. After travelling for many kilometres the land changes again to one of no greenery at all. Now we were in rock country. This is the most amazing environment, it’s like what I would expect on other planets. I was going to try to describe the types of formations and colouring, which is basically different shades of grey, but I’ve concluded that would not be possible. It’s simply something one has to see with own eyes.

After leaving this area we re-enter the world of green, but in a gentle way with hedges and green grass, and then comes the outskirts of Ronda. This is a major town and also a significant tourist centre. Its draw is the El Tajo gorge. The land extends at one level, then suddenly falls away by about 300 feet. This must surely be something of a rarity in Spain. In the United States there is the Grand Canyon, and that would be something similar, except that with the Ronda Gorge the drop off is only on one side.

Amazingly, down below there are homes and farms and a mini-community. I’m sure that far too many people give in to the temptation to see how long something thrown takes to reach the bottom.

So, an enjoyable visit to the southern parts of Spain, and in particular the inland and remote parts that I’m sure many would say, “This is Real Spain.”

Copyright © 2008 Eugene Carmichael

250 kmp/h

I was driving the CV-35 during a period when it was very quiet. It was a lovely day, and as I drove I had my driver’s side window down. Ahead of me in the right lane was a learner-driver cruising along at about 85, so I moved into the middle lane to overtake her as I was moving at about 115-120 kmp/h.

Suddenly, I was overtaken by two cars. The first was a white car, being either an Audi TT or a Porshce, and that was followed closely by a dark blue beemer. (BMW) They were travelling at about 250 kmp/h.

Mainly, I want to try to describe the experience of having that happen so unexpectedly, but I’m sure it can only be appreciated if you’ve lived through it.

I didn’t see them coming, so the first I knew was when they passed me. With my window open I was treated to both sudden sound and movement. If I tell you that the sound was of the nature of an explosion I’m sure you can appreciate that.

Blam! That was accompanied by a big push, and they were gone. I quite literally jumped and my heart went to my throat. I let out a foul cry, too objectionable for this blog, because I thought I’d been hit. I followed that with :” You stupid bastards! Slow down!”

I’ve said this before and I’m moved to say it again: Eliminate stupidity from the roads and our crash statistics will fall like a rock. Why would a person think that it was ok to push their car to that limit, at any time of the day or night, when they know that the maximum speed limit is 120 kmp/h? They don’t have to be particularly bright to know that up ahead there will be other road users travelling at half their speed, and that there would be no way that they could slow in time to avoid a crash.

It’s especially annoying that the people who do this type of stupidity are also rich. It’s too bad that the gain of money doesn’t necessarily mean a gain in common sense. The drivers who did that were simply hooligans, but rich ones. A hooligan is a hooligan, is a hooligan. That the person is rich doesn’t make him, or her, any better.

While we are on the topic, why do manufacturers release to the public vehicles that can travel so fast anyway? The speed limit is set at 120, so why does my car’s speedometer suggest that it can get up to 240. When am I likely to need to travel at that speed? I’m fairly certain that my car would start to disintegrate over 200 kmp/h, and I say that as a Volvo driver.

Apparently no crash occurred, but that in itself was an accident. Good fortune was firmly on everyone’s side that day. Those two morons were certainly tempting fate severely.

So, for goodness sake, let common sense rule. Slow down and save my life. I also suggest that we each preserve our own lives for the one’s who love us.

Copyright © 2008 Eugene Carmichael
“The woods are lovely, dark and deep. But I have promises to keep, And miles to go before I sleep, And miles to go before I sleep.” (Frost)

Do we Drive Too Much?

To live free is truly a wonderful thing! We take it for granted and we forget about what it takes to keep us so. That’s a particular shame because people lose their lives in the commission of freedom. Those individuals and their families who make it possible should occupy a high position in our consciousness.

What do we do with our freedoms? All the many aspects of living go under that heading, even the committing of crimes. That’s what freedom means, to be able to do what we choose when we decide. This got me to thinking about our use of the highways, and the reasons we use our cars and bikes. I’m sure there is a real case to be made for overly using the facilities. England is thinking about charging a fee per trip. Should they do that, it will be interesting to note the effect on the consumer.

Lately I haven’t been out much. My petrol bill has been halved as I spend a lot more time in front of my computer. I have to admit that I get the urge to go out, and that usually means by car or motorbike. Why not just go for a walk? That would do me a lot of good, but I prefer to go by car.

I recall the time of my youth back in Bermuda before the car was introduced for public use. Cars appeared on our roads in general circulation in 1947, and it was many years after that before it could be said that they were in “normal” use. During those times people walked. Firstly, everybody kept a garden to grow vegetables. Ours was a family of seven children and two parents, so we had to be self-supporting. We also kept chickens, and on Fridays it was my duty after school to go and bring in the fish for dinner.

Please note that I was not commanded to try, I was told to just do it. I have no recollection of ever having failed. There were no supermarkets in those days, just Mom & Pop grocery stores where we went on Saturdays to get stuff that we couldn’t grow. What an adventure that was! I always looked forward to receiving an apple or orange. It was only after having moved here to Spain did I get in the habit of eating more than one fruit in a single sitting. My son can demolish a kilo or more of mandarins in one go.

Our shopping habits were vastly different back then in the good old days. We shopped once a week in spite of the fact that we did not have a refrigerator. These days food stores remain open 24-hours a day, and there is always someone inside doing their shopping.

So, in the old days we just didn’t move around much. Life was lived in the neighbourhood, and pretty much everything was local. We thought that it was amazing that my father cycled thirteen miles to see my mother. Since then, I have held courtships in other countries.

Recently Valencia held what it called una dia sin coches. That was a day to encourage people not to drive their cars. Instead we were invited to dust off our bicycles and to get around in that manner. I did cooperate by simply doing nothing.

As petrol prices began to climb I started to think carefully about the use of my car. It seems that I was forever going somewhere. Now, I try to combine into one journey several things. For instance, I live in Pedralba which is about 50 kilometros from downtown Valencia. So, if I need to drive into the city I try and save up several things that have to be done along the way. Clearly, if I can use one journey to accomplish many things I am cutting down on costs and fuel.

The peculiar thing about all this is that the CV-35 has now been upgraded and driving along it is such a pleasure as the congestion is a thing of the past. (Hopefully!) However, I do invite you to consider whether the next trip out in your car is really necessary, simply in the interest of reduced fuel and use of space.

Copyright © 2008 Eugene Carmichael

Unconscious Driving

One of my favourite columns is written by a psychologist/hypnotist. He covers some very interesting subject matter that serves to remind me of how complex we humans are.

He was trying to make the point that most people go through life in two forms. There is our conscious mind that drives us to do things when we are fully involved and perfectly aware of what we are doing. For the most part the sorts of things we are likely to do under this state are new things; current challenges; problems to be worked out on the fly. We have to be involved with these matters, as we have never encountered them before, so they require our full concentration.

Then he said that there is the other state of being that operates under our unconscious mind. I’m going to make bold and suggest that he may have intended to say our sub-conscious mind, because that seems more appropriate with what he suggested we do under this state.

Our sub-conscious accounts for our other personality. It deals with all the many things that we have learnt over the years that we now do without giving any thought. For instance, the simple typing of this piece involves both parts of me. I don’t have to think as I type, but I do have to think about what I’m typing. This is a new thread that requires my concentration, but the computer is something known to me.

When we eat we do so without thought, but what we eat does provoke us into being critical, praising, or just neutral. When it comes to riding a cycle, or horse, or driving a car, we go onto auto-control. However, while we really don’t have to think about the gear we just changed into, we do think about road conditions. It is entirely possible that many people end up in car crashes because they trusted too much to the sub-conscious.

I have written before about driving habits while we are too distracted. The trick is to remember that our car and our living room are two distinct entities and must never be confused. To mistake the situation when driving is potentially deadly. Have you ever come across a one-car crash along a straight road? The problem there was most likely that the driver turned his head to talk to his front seat passenger and simply drove off the road.

The rule to keep in mind is to pay attention to what you are doing that is of the primary purpose. Keep your eyes on the road and never let too much responsibility slip from your conscious to your sub-conscious mind.

If we do actually drive in an unconscious state, that might explain all those ridiculous crashes. Many people do seem to drive like that.

Copyright © 2008 Eugene Carmichael

Stupidity

I was thinking that if stupidity on the roads could be eliminated entirely, the number of motor “accidents” would fall tremendously.

Wouldn’t that be a wonderful thing!

Copyright © 2008 Eugene Carmichael

Discipline

Driving is supposed to be a very disciplined activity, just by its definition. It’s all about the rules of the road and is dependent on everyone knowing what they are supposed to do, and carrying out their duties in a workman-like manner. So, when I approach a stop sign all other road users in the vicinity are supposed to be able to rely on me to stop at the appropriate place. In this country, the Spanish roads are notorious for indiscipline. It’s as though we’ve never heard of the word.

By comparison certain other countries develop drivers who are super disciplined, and it is an absolute eye opener to ride with such people. I have been passenger on two occasions when very careful people were driving the vehicles, and frankly, it was wonderful. I was somewhat concerned that other people had no idea of what was taking place. I could image conversations in the cars behind me going something like this: “What is he doing?” “I’m not sure, but it looks like he’s obeying the law.” “Why?”

I’m not talking about anything radical, just adhering to the rules that we are all supposed to know about. It goes something like this: After we all buckled up, our journey began. Even while we were still on the estate road turn signals were given, even if there were no other vehicles around. We maintained travel along the right side of the road, and when we came to stop signs we actually stopped and stood completely still for a count of three.

As we proceeded along the road we observed the speed limit signs precisely. Especially those signs that reduce speed were scruptously obeyed. In fact when we passed each sign our speed was compatible, even if our driver had to use the brakes to slow down.

Hands were always at the ten to two position except when shifting gears. No overtakes were even attempted except of tractors. When driving through towns our drivers were super alert to pedestrians suddenly appearing out in front of us, or traffic lights suddenly changing.

One of the drivers was from germany, and he explained that his reward for all that discipline was the autobahn when he can drive as fast as he wants. Even then he had never exceeded150 kmh/s.

This was all very commendable, and by comparison with the usual driver on Spanish roads was worthy of a medal. However, owing to the fundamental suspicious nature of the police, were they to be observers they would no doubt have wondered: what is that man carrying that is so illegal that he does not want to give us any cause to stop him?

Sometimes it’s very difficult to win.

Copyright © 2008 Eugene Carmichael

The Elitist Valencia Formula One

The day was just fine. Glorious sunshine, excited crowds, more than 112,000 paid admissions, a brand-new track, and the dream came true. The waiting was over. There had been so much preparation and anxiety that it would be completed on time, but that was all in the past.

The idea was the brainchild of the president of the Valencia Community, Frances Camps, and the long-time mayoress of Valencia, Rita Barberá. Valencia has always been considered the poor cousin behind Madrid and Barcelona, but the dynamic duo have determined to change all that.

First they have set about doing what they can on a local level to encourage participation in the annual fiestas, and they have promoted Valencia for its exports and its sports, particularly football. Then, taking a huge gamble they bid for America’s Cup, and got it. That meant a massive investment in the port area that had been ignored for so many years. It was said that Valencia was a city that turned its back on the sea and its port.

So America’s Cup came to Valencia, and the average resident could not have cared less. It was an event that was held way out there on the water, and it brought higher prices on land as the teams sought the best accommodation, and drove up real estate and staple goods prices. Were it not for those things we could have ignored America’s Cup altogether, however, Formula One racing in the city was something else again.

This was an event that was loud and brash and in everybody’s face. City Hall was faced with major protests from city residents who were not amused by the prospect of so much noise. In her typical brilliant fashion, Mayor Barbará suggested that it be held in August, the traditional month when most residents head out of town on vacation. That was an instant hit. Because not only could many residents leave town, they could also rent out their balconies and rooftops for insane amounts of money, so Formula One was off to a fine start in first gear.

To accommodate the new track a swing bridge had to be built and new asphalt put down that would be of racing standard. Much of the track consists of existing roadways that take in a loop around the City of Arts and Sciences, the signature image for Valencia.

The reason I call this an elite event is that you had to be able to find at least two hundred euros to watch the action live. Tickets prices originally were between two hundred and five hundred euros, but when they sold out scalpers made a fortune. Obscene amounts of money were charged for balconies and rooftops for the three-day event. Missing was any accommodation for the general public of a standing-only area for spectators who could only afford more modest prices.

Organisers did set up a screen along the Malvarrosa beach for the public to follow the race on television. Apparently about 600 million people watched around the world, but the local television stations, Canal 9 and Punto 2 were free to show anything they wanted, just as long as it was not live action from the track. Such was the cost of broadcast rights. Understandably, this is one very expensive sport to fund, but by providing a section for cheap viewing, and by upgrading the public toilets from the portaloos to something more dignified, there would not have been any criticism at all.
I acknowledge that one-month before the real race there had been Formula Three racing to test the track at a cost of only 10 euros a day. I took full advantage of that
I also note that the City laid on free concerts for the general public, including Gloria Estafan. Shame about the rain!

I must not leave this thread without mentioning that Valencia has a first-class racing track at Cheste that led many of us to question why the race had to be held in the streets. The owners of the track at Cheste must have taken their snub very hard, but they have decided to strike back in a very positive way by bringing The Madonna Travelling Road Show to town. I’m almost tempted to go see the show, even though Madonna is not even on my list of admired artists, just to see what they do with 88 trailer loads of equipment.

For the future we can almost be sure that Valencia will become a centre for tennis.

Copyright © 2008 Eugene Carmichael